Della Duck (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sos_pilot) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
shellphones2025-01-10 04:25 pm
sos_pilot) wrote in shellphones2025-01-10 04:25 pm
Entry tags:
video
Type: Video
Sender ID:perfpilot (Della Duck)
To: Public
Subject: Bad Guy Warnings
Warnings: N/A
Hey there, party people! If we haven't met yet, name's Della Duck!
So after witnessing some shenanigans on the network, some more obvious than others, I thought I'd do everyone here a service and warn them about potential people from my world. If this place can bring in bad guys, it's best to be prepared. So, here we go!
[ to wit, she begins holding up crude crayon drawings of the following people. ]
Mark Beaks! So, he's technically really smart with tech stuff, but he prefers to steal other people's work and claim it as his own. Solution - distract him with how few followers he has on the network, then punch him in the face.
Next, Ma Beagle! Head of the Beagle Boys gang! Don't let her height fool you, she packs a punch and can rob banks in her sleep. Solution - disarm the purse, it's got all kind of weapons in there, then punch her in the face.
Then, Don Karnage! Leader of the Sky Pirates, he might feel right at home here. Good swordsman, better singer. Solution - challenge him to a singing competition, then punch him in the face.
Last, and worst, is Magica De Spell. Sorceress supreme, and pure evil to the bone. Petty streak that can and has lasted for decades. Solution - break her magic scepter, then punch her in the face.
Now, my world has WAY more bad guys than that, but these are the most dangerous, in my opinion. And hey, feel free to share deets about the baddies from your world! We're all in this together!
Sender ID:perfpilot (Della Duck)
To: Public
Subject: Bad Guy Warnings
Warnings: N/A
Hey there, party people! If we haven't met yet, name's Della Duck!
So after witnessing some shenanigans on the network, some more obvious than others, I thought I'd do everyone here a service and warn them about potential people from my world. If this place can bring in bad guys, it's best to be prepared. So, here we go!
[ to wit, she begins holding up crude crayon drawings of the following people. ]
Mark Beaks! So, he's technically really smart with tech stuff, but he prefers to steal other people's work and claim it as his own. Solution - distract him with how few followers he has on the network, then punch him in the face.
Next, Ma Beagle! Head of the Beagle Boys gang! Don't let her height fool you, she packs a punch and can rob banks in her sleep. Solution - disarm the purse, it's got all kind of weapons in there, then punch her in the face.
Then, Don Karnage! Leader of the Sky Pirates, he might feel right at home here. Good swordsman, better singer. Solution - challenge him to a singing competition, then punch him in the face.
Last, and worst, is Magica De Spell. Sorceress supreme, and pure evil to the bone. Petty streak that can and has lasted for decades. Solution - break her magic scepter, then punch her in the face.
Now, my world has WAY more bad guys than that, but these are the most dangerous, in my opinion. And hey, feel free to share deets about the baddies from your world! We're all in this together!
no subject
Did I ever...?
[Eyebrow raising in tandem, though the cold sweat running down his brow is hard to miss. It's a bit lame to openly admit he got cursed in a stupid way!]
no subject
[ To which she demonstrates by twirling her pointer fingers.
What kind of thing could he possibly turn into? Will he divulge the secret? ]
(1/2)
(2/2)
... My old man sucker-punched me into one.
[So technically not a lie.]
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[ Sucking in air through her teeth. Sometimes they have teeth, it flip-flops. ]
Did he at least apologize?
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PFFFT-
[Ranma doubles over guffawing like Della just told the world's funniest joke. He has to wipe a tear from under his eye by the end of his laughing fit.]
As if! Pop'd rather do anything else than owning up to his stupidity. [That, and he was a panda. Couldn't mutter a single word, not that that changes anything.]
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... Did you get him back and shove him into one? Because I definitely would have done that.
[ She's feeling like a better parent in comparison, at least? ]
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No. He got cursed before me. We went to China to train at this trainings ground Pop heard about that sounded really cool to him. Thing is, he didn't know how to speak Chinese, much less how to read a lick of it. So neither of us knew it was cursed 'till after I kicked him in one while sparring. He comes back out as giant panda, he's pissed off...
[Della can fill in the blanks what came next.]
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... And given you've gone this far without saying what you turn into, I'm guessing you want to keep that secret.
... All right then! Consider it unknown. I won't ask about it, won't poke and prod, and won't ever bring it up again. You have my word.
[ of course she WANTS to know, but she's not going to rip apart Ranma's privacy for her own curiosity. ]
(1/2)
... Screw it.]
Eh, it's cool. Most people I've known here found out about it already, it's an open secret at this point. Besides, you're gonna see it sooner or later. It isn't like this place is lacking in water. Just, give me a sec'.
[Ranma leaves the frame of his camera, disappearing entirely from view. It's really not a big deal to him anymore, anyway. He's had enough time to start treating it like most other things in his life with complete blasé.
When he returns, it's with a glass of water.]
It's better if I show you than try to explain it, so...
[Without further ado, he lifts the glass over his head, turning it over to let the contents spill out all over him.]
(2/2)
[In the second it took for the water to travel from head to toes, almost obscuring him despite it being an itty-bitty glass, by the end of it Ranma was entirely replaced. Before sat an average height, black-haired teenage boy.
Now? There sat a crimson-haired, short teenage girl with the exact same hairstyle and wearing the exact, albeit slightly baggy, clothes as Ranma before her.]
Surprise?
[A weak attempt to add a little pizazz to the display.]
no subject
[ Aw, now she feels guilty! But it's too late, he's already gone. She sighs - all right, can't say she didn't try. And there goes the reveal!
... Oh.
Well.
No wonder he wanted to keep it a secret. Progressive as 2017 was, even then gender shouldn't be FORCED upon folks. She blinks, and tries to think of something positive to say. ]
... At least you're a cute girl?
no subject
[Consider this Della unlocking his tragic origin story finally.]
S'one of the few benefits it came with.
[Della might be trying to make her feel better about it, but she's not gonna act like her good looks didn't carry over with the change.]
You don't gotta pity me, Del. I've had this curse for years now, it doesn't bug me as much as it used to. [Being in this place too, admittedly, also helped. People here are less judgmental or weirded out by it compared to home.] It's not the worst thing I thing got stuck with. There's plenty of crappy ones out there.
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There is, but that's all the way in China. I can't just drop everything and head off to it whenever I want like it's the local market. Ferries cost a lotta money. And the old fart's stoppin' me from tryin' to swim there again for... reasons.
[aka "his dad doesn't trust him to not run off and abandon the engagement". But that's just another tragic origin story Della's not at the social link to learn that plot point yet.]
Any time I did get t' go back there, it was for slightly more important stuff. It's hard to think about jumpin' in one when there's people tryin' to kill you or people you know. Last time I was there, the springs got overflooded thanks to a fight I was in, makin' them useless.
[Still usable, though only if you want to become a freaky chimera of various creatures. From what she heard, the springs did go back to normal... Buuuuut she'd have to bring up some other stuff she'd rather keep a tight lip about.]
no subject
(1/2)
[She's not joking here, it wouldn't be a surprise to her if that was a real spring. There's a bunch of weird and wack ones out there. 'Spring of Drowned Yeti Riding A Bull Carrying a Crane and Eel' comes to mind.]
On the plus side of this whole mess, it's easy to switch back. Usually.
[From the ether, out pops that thermos Della watched Ranma use to scald himself. And like before, she dumps the contents over her head...]
(2/2)
Oh, uh, I forgot to give the heads up. Sorry.
[Tbf tho, he thought everything before was enough of a warning that he was going to douse himself in boiling water again.]
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Does it always have to be THAT hot? It can't even just be luke-warm or room temperature?
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Nah, tap water works too. I've just done it enough times and been burnt enough that both feels the same to me.
[Same deal goes for fire. He's uniquely resilient when it comes to various degrees of burns.]
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That... is not exactly reassuring and makes me feel even worse for you? Like it or not, next time I'm seeing you, it's hug city.
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C'mon Dels, you don't gotta do that.
[He doesn't see what's the issue here is????]
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Good luck, you're gonna need it.
[Look at the time, it's high time to turn off the video camera. No, he's not intimidated, don't be ridiculous.]