shellphones | [open] 🔥 the zack & kaveh drunk hour show

Entry tags:

[open] 🔥 the zack & kaveh drunk hour show

Type: Text
Sender ID: activatingcombatmode (Zack Fair)
To: Public
Subject: Let's be honest
Warnings: gpoys and pictures, dumb ass drunks, alcohol use

[So two idiots walk into a ship-bar and get drunk and start talking about how ✨attractive✨ their partner (or almost partner) is. What happens, as a result, is a stupid drunken argument about who’s partner is hotter. Someone please stop them before they make even bigger fools of themselves?!]

I’ve got a serious question for you gusy, who do you think is better llooking?

That big guy alhaitham with the permanent normal face

Or G’raha tia, cute cat man with the best looking back muscles you’ll ever see ahahhaha

Did i mention cute? Cat ears and tail. Cute when he purrs. And so smrt you’ll feel like a better person just talkin to him.

Who else could you even say is hot?

[Someone PLEASE stop them. Or post pictures of who your character thinks is the hottest. Or post yourself, that’s great too. Or post more cats? This will be a very unconventional version of the Hot or Not meme.

Use the html below to resize your pictures so they’re not massive huge:]

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[After losing so many friends, there was something about talking to Gale about it that she tried to have some other outlook on it.]

Somehow I had a feeling I couldn’t shake you.

It’s…good to see you back.

it's good to be back!

my memory's kind of shaky from last time, but i still got the broad strokes. coming back the second time is kind of weird experience. . .!

( as someone used to the threat of mental fuckery, karlach already knows the number one rule of communicating it to the people who matter. )

we'll just have to make up for lost time girlie!

Did you have a place in mind so I can calmly explain what’s happened? Or you can excitedly tell me from your end what’s been going on with you?

tell me where to go and i'll meet you there

I'm at (insert burger joint here). I'll treat you to a burger and fries. Wendy being off limits despite the resemblance.

that's food right? say no more.

i'll be there soon

[Karlach would arrive to the burger joint with Daria and her bunger, Wendy, sitting on a picnic bench. Wendy is wearing a small little party hat. She was very elegant. All hail Her Majesty. She wasn't wearing one before but they had them behind the counter for parties. This was a party. Sort of? Seeing Karlach, she gently waved.]

( all things considered, karlach is pretty speedy about making her way over to where daria has been waiting for her. and if the idea of trying new exotic foods put an extra spring in her step—well, that's only justifiable. )

Hey there! It's been a while!

( a friendly wave back.

then a gesture towards the bunger. )

Whoa! Was I gone so long that you got a summon? What kind of creature is that?

Oh, she was a summon alright.

[Upon knowing Karlach was a friendly person, Wendy seemed to hop over to her excitedly like a puppy. With her party hat tucked on tight enough that it just bounced with her.

BOINGER.]

She followed me home from that Snaxburg Island. And that was the story.

[She made sure she got Karlach a menu. It was staple burger joint fare. Big ass burgers and fresh cut fries with tap beers.]

They let me borrow the hat, so now it looks like a proper welcome back party.

Whoa, easy there! I'm not ready to burn anyone today.

( a quick step back, lest the little thing get a mind to try pouncing. )

Ohhh, I heard about that place. I didn't get a chance to go myself. Been about neck deep in construction jobs all over these islands from that crazy wind storm that hit everyone.

( but they said it had food animals? was that thing supposed to be food?

could she take a bite out of it. . .?

karlach wonders, looking down at it curiously. )

Well, congratulations! It's a big event for anyone to get a companion.

( then immediately, as the topic reminds her— )

You wouldn't happen to know where Footloose has been, would you?

( she misses her own companion. )

Come on, Wendy. You had your fun.

[Bbwoonnngerrr… Wendy moaned as she waddled back to hanging out around Daria’s boots.

Please do not eat the Bunger for the love of god Karlach.]

No wonder I didn’t see much of you, sorry I didn’t reach out sooner. It’s been-

[Rough. Astarion, Fenris, and Xenk left and her crew was no longer a thing. But she found other people in a crew. Right now it just didn’t feel the same.

She was silent until a small curve resembling a smile came.

That’s right. Footloose. The cat Daria took care of just in case she came back.

And she came back.

That was new.]

She’s at my house, the one I share with Gale now. She’s keeping Tara and Bramblesong busy.

Edited 2024-06-11 11:28 (UTC)

Don't think twice about it! You don't owe me anything.

( certainly not any sort of apology. if anything, it should be karlach extending her sorries for leaving as abruptly as she apparently did. it's never easy to have to deal with a missing friend in any capacity. )

But I'm real glad to know my little soldier's been in expert care.

( unfortunately, this confirms that footloose is absolutely furious with her. she hadn't seen a single hair of that white furball when she came to check on gale. ughhhh. she was going to have to figure that one out. how did one apologise to a cat?

maybe she'll bring her fistfuls of fish or something.

then karlach grins. )

Wow. I leave and you start making moves on the ol' wizard? Never let anyone say you keep it idle, Bangs!

( said with a loud laugh. while she didn't actually believe that to have happened, she finds the mental image of it fun. )

How you been holding up?

[Daria's eyes widened a bit at that. KARLACH OMG!]

It's not like that, he's a friend. We also used to be in the same crew.

[She frowned a little as she could feel Wendy's legs curl on hers. Seriously, this thing was so dumb it was cute.]

The one we started with Astarion, Xenk, and Fenris. But they all left so...we kinda were both aimless and then did our own thing.

Yeah, I've been told a little about that.

( from gale. he had already made her aware of the vampire's disappearance. she couldn't find it in herself to be too broken up about it when she was already secure in the knowledge of where he is and how he's faring. )

I'm sorry that everyone disappeared like that. Couldn't have been good for either of your hearts.

( she's sympathetic about that part. it's never easy to have to separate from people who matter to you. )

But if it helps, I can tell you that I saw Fangs before I got here and he's still up to no good. As usual.

( a smile. )

...Right, you're from the same place.

[She did hope he was okay in particular. Of the times they spoke, they barely crossed the barrier of Daria accepting his vampirisms. He held that secret so close to him and Daria took every single motion to be sensitive and attentive to it. Because Astarion mattered a lot to her, enough anyway that she wanted him to feel safe.

But he knew what he was about.

And he was still living.

It got her to smile just a little.]

As expected, I'm glad to hear it.

[Truly. This was a much better message than she could ever hope. She couldn't bear to hear anything bad. After all, she had no context to any of her other friends.]

A-anyway, that's about it on my end. I've been doing the usual nonsense and then I got suckered into another crew. At least stupid can happen again in company. So that just leaves the mystery of you, then.

Xenk too. That guy's a bloody fucking legend, he's doing perfectly fine no matter where he is.

( karlach continues on as she moves closer, finally pulling out a chair to take a seat across from daria. )

And Fenris—I fought beside him before, he's tough as nails.

( they're all strong guys and karlach wants daria to know that so she can put her mind at rest. if you can't be together, then the next best thing is to know that they're still healthy and whole. )

I don't think you need to worry about those guys. Just what's in front of you now.

( then a bark of a laugh. )

Don't be so quick! I want to hear more about you. What crew did you join? You've been up to anything else? Don't be stingy and entertain an ol' tiefling.

[...All good words to hear. It put a small sincere smile on her face.]

You're right. Just wish I could bother them with my inane banter like it was a new hobby, that's all.

Wasn't able to do much of that. Reunions hardly happened since I started travelling like this.

[Air escaped her nostrils as she let out a hearty sigh.]

With exceptions. I guess I have to babble to you now, don't I? You and Gale may make me an optimist yet. I joined the Raiders of the Lost Arts, hopefully it'll make me less bored and even less dead. Still trying to figure out what I can offer on that front. Other than that, uh, been trying to keep up with target practice.

[Beside her skirt, there was a holster. Reaching in, she held up a somewhat modded gun.]

( yet another laugh, but this one is from delighted surprise. )

Then I guess that makes us crew-mates! I got asked to join up with them not that long ago.

( she grins, leaning in on the table slightly. )

Guess there'll be plenty of time for that inane banter yet.

[Daria tried to hide it under the menu, but there was a slightly bigger smile. That. That made her feel really good. Like she was no longer surrounded by strangers kind of good.]

So, crewmate, are you gonna order something or do you need the banter from the professional over here?

( hmmm! )

I think I'm going to need the professional. I've never had grub like this.

( gringringringrin. )

So order me something good, yeah?

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