shellphones | text | un: astudyinviolet

Type:Text
Sender ID: astudyinviolet (Sherlock Holmes)
To: public
Subject: Magic: deciding, gaining, learning
Warnings: none atm

[ Perhaps this was inevitable given recent events and Sherlock's insecurities about his worth and ability to have purpose in this world. ]

I have a small series of questions to ask those who have gone from not having magic to having magic. Of particular interest are those who have only gained magic from this world, but I will not turn away answers from others either.

The reason I ask these questions is I come from a world where magic is usually a trick using sleight of hand and obfuscation. I inherited my brother's notebooks covering magical theories of this world, but they do not go into the more practical applications or personal aspects of magic. Surely the tattoo is only a single step among many.

How did you decide on what magic to learn?
How did you learn to control that magic?
Do you feel who you are fundamentally has changed? How so?
Have you created any contingency plans in case something goes wrong with your magic or yourself?

[ He... really hopes no one reads too deeply into that last one, but it is a worry Sherlock has given family history and having others within his head before.

And because he learned from Alhaitham's survey... ]

I understand that such a topic might be very personal. Respond anonymously if you desire and only what you are comfortable with sharing. If you'd rather meet in person, I can arrange that as well.

S.H.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ He'll play a simple, calm tune then. The extra sound will help mask their voices as any eavesdroppers will be drawn to the violin rather than the people speaking. ]

My thoughts have drifted towards what I'm able to do in this world. I am not content to exist in a dull routine, stagnate and rebelling against my nature. Yet, I cannot deny that I have concerns about granting myself access to magic.

I take it things have not been going well for you either.

[The tune was unfamiliar to her, but Miriam didn't find it overly distracting or difficult to listen to him.]

You're right to be cautious; magic can be a double-edged tool. Incredibly helpful, and yet...dreadful, when turned against you.

[The fidgeting got worse as she said that last part. Miriam only realized it belatedly, and stopped with a sigh, leaving her poor sleeve alone.]

Practice will make control easier, as it will with most things. But as for a containment measure...

[She almost started picking at her sleeve again, and forced herself to stop.]

Those which I know of aren't guaranteed to work.

[ Miriam's nerves show, which only makes makes him more concerned. She has proven herself reliable in the past, so what would make her like this? What happened? ]

What contingency plan didn't work and how? Even one failing to do its job could still provide useful data in creating others.

[ He could at least know what not to do, and there could be ways the plan could be improved upon. ]

[Miriam draws in a breath, releasing it in a sigh. It didn't quite help as much as she liked, but at least Sherlock's calm reaction helped. He wasn't responding with fear or revulsion, only an academic curiosity. A little concern, too.]

Some background may help; it's a little complicated.

[She pulled her sleeve back to reveal one of the rosettes of crystal on her arm; she taps it, and it rings hollow as glass.]

I'm what's called a Shardbinder; my power is derived from these crystals grafted to me. They themselves are fragments left behind from a fallen demon or supernal being that are drawn to the crystals already present.

The script around the largest of them was added later; it's meant to keep them sealed and prevent their further spread and corruption. Without them, the crystals would continue to grow until my body fossilizes. [Nevermind the mental toll they'd take.] And...for a time, the seals worked as they were written. Most of them still do.

[Here Miriam fell silent for awhile, steeling herself to proceed. The new crystal lay inert and dull on her collarbone, yet felt heavy and cold as a burdensome stone.]

But the demons within my crystal and those outside of them are always trying to claw control to themselves. For a moment, in the Abyss...one succeeded.

[She'd managed to wrestle it into its bindings in the end, but the damage had been done--to her psyche, and the friends who'd been hurt by her power.]

[ Sherlock listens, though his violin changes to a faster tune. He'll wave off any attention to it, but the increased pace is to help mask her voice when revealing more personal details. He slows as she finishes, back to that calmer, steady tune. ]

The Abyss seemed to be a demon of itself, to say little of what lived within it. I could make only as far as the fourth level before I had to return.

[ His body had really started to suffer under that extra strain. Sherlock can see how it could also overwhelm the seals on Miriam's body. ]

You had a plan to keep the demons within the crystals, but you did not have one for if that containment broke.

[ And that is a gap in Miriam's contingency plan. ]

I have thought of what might be done for myself should I lose control. I value the safety of those around me over my life, and I would welcome being sent to my death. I carry no illusion that it would be physically easy for someone to carry out, but I fear too many would let their feelings interfere.

[For a moment after the music intensified Miriam went quiet a moment, listening. But it didn't drown out what she had to say, entirely, and as she continued Sherlock responded like he could hear her just fine. So Miriam continued too.]

In a way, yes. Should the seals fail and never return, my curse will progress again. I once had a...resolution, for this eventuality. I no longer do.

[Her breath caught a moment as the memories of that horrible dark pulled older ones to the front of her mind. It took Miriam a moment to steady herself again, shear the emotion from her words. This wasn't the time. Like all the previous times weren't.]

My friend, Gebel, we had...an agreement of that nature. We were cursed with the same crystal, the same demons. But we could still choose how to use the power we were given. If...one of us lost the ability to choose, the other would intervene.

[With words ideally, but...she'd already endured the realistic outcome. The crystals' corrupting process wasn't something that could be undone. The magics of this world seemed more...tranquil, in comparison, but underestimating any kind of power was perilous.

This wasn't an offer to be made lightly. But it seemed a prudent one to make early, rather than too late.]

...I could offer you the same, if it would bring you reassurance.

[ This is not what Sherlock expected, and the next note screeches before he catches himself and returns to playing normally. ]

It would.

[ That removes a huge weight off Sherlock's shoulders. He has seen what became of someone close to him, and he has seen what became of Rochester. The combination of the two risks converging on him horrifies Sherlock. He would rather die than inflict that on others. ]

I do not know if I could offer the same in return. I can try. It is not a matter of will but a matter of strength.

[ Just like he may not be able to fight against a god, he doesn't think he could stand against a demon if all the human, with the fragility of their life, is gone. ]

I would try.

[The hitch in the music started Miriam out of the gloomy circle her thoughts had been travelling in--just as the counteroffer surprised her. She blinked a moment, and didn't smile--this was too solemn for smiles. But she does nod, and some of the tension wound into her shoulders relaxed.]

Ah--thank you. That means a great deal to me.

[Johannes was no great warrior either, but he was the one who'd been able to stop the worst of her curse's progression.]

Power isn't all flashy magic. The mind is a powerful thing too.

The mind is a double-edged sword capable of felling dragons and cutting its wielder into ribbons.

[ Sherlock doesn't elaborate, but perhaps he doesn't need to given that he's worried about losing control and hurting others. There's enough hinted in the shadows of his words. ]

Thank you for speaking with me about this. I feel like have a direction now.

[ Miriam's decision to chose an element that goes against her grafted powers will eventually give Sherlock the push he needs. Sherlock thinks himself as someone seeped in darkness, drowning in the Abyss, so he chooses light. ]

text | un: astudyinviolet

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject