Miles "Tails" Prower (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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shellphones2025-05-08 10:41 pm
playertwotailed) wrote in shellphones2025-05-08 10:41 pm
Entry tags:
[VIDEO] TailsTube: Episode 1
Type: Video
Sender ID: SkyPatrol
To: Public
Subject: TailsTube: Episode 01 [LIVE!]
Warnings: bullying foxes
[The feed opens up to Tails' cabin on the Stormbringer. He's spent a bit of time and effort on getting it ready for the camera: Tools put away neatly on a pegboard, a few potted plants over here, some hand-drawn blueprints over there... the space still looks lived in, but mindfully so. And on top of it all, there's a banner reading "TAILSTUBE" pinned up on the wall behind him.]
[There's a moment's hesitation as the fox double-checks his shellphone, sees that it's recording properly, then backs up to fit in the camera's frame:]
Hey guys! Welcome to the inaugural episode of... TailsTube: Sea Fox Edition! [A quick jazz-hands towards the banner behind him!] Back home, TailsTube was my streaming channel, where I brought on the coolest guests I could find to hang out, answer your questions, and have some fun! Now, unfortunately, my setup here still needs a few upgrades before it can hold a candle to my original lab...
So, u-uh... [He pauses, clears his throat — summons up some willpower to say this next part with a smile.] This is also the first episode with a paid sponsor. And it's none other than Dr. Eggman himself!
... no one's more surprised about this than I am, guys.
[Normally, this is about the point where he would pull up some stunning, HQ art and graphics to add some context and flavor to the topic of discussion. But low-tech is the name of the game, and luckily, he's a fairly good artist. So, instead, he's standing up a poster display with drawings of Eggman's notorious creations, including various badniks, some weapons and obstacles, and his villainous pièce de résistance, the Death Egg.]
Back on our home world, Eggman's name is synonymous with terror and disaster. He's invented countless dangerous weapons and built an entire robotic military, which he's used in his many ill-fated plots to conquer our world! So, even though he's making peace with us for now, I can't help but be skeptical...
But on the other hand, if it is true? I'm actually kinda excited. Because Dr. Eggman does his best work when he's not trying to kill us.
[And here comes a second poster display, featuring some of the doctor's lesser known creations. For example, there's the E-Gear and a few other models of Extreme Gear, as well as some of his communication tech.]
And after looking over his new Radniks, I can say they seem like a step in the right direction. None of them come with any weapons, no animals are harmed in their creation or operation... even the code is pretty straightforward assistant stuff. So, if that's what we can expect going forward—
And that's where you're wrong, you twin-tailed toddler!
[The feed goes dark for a moment and there's a...well, it's a ruckus. Because Eggman has crashed the set of TailsTube and he's decided that now is his time to make an entrance. When the feed comes back, Eggman's taken a seat next to Tails. One leg crossed over the other, hands steepled in his lap. Where did he get that egg-shaped chair? He brought it. Don't ask questions. Especially if they're stupid.]
Since when have I ever given you anything you all 'expected?' The true hallmark of a genius is to subvert expectations! To shift paradigms! To—
[He turns to look at Tails' display and huffs disapprovingly.]
What are these? They look like they were drawn by a child. If you're going to showcase my work, at least put in effort.
[And Tails' fuzzy cheeks puff in his own disapproval at the critique. He put plenty of effort into it! ... but before the fox can get a word in edgewise, Eggman spins back around, sneering.]
Now, as I was saying! Tails here has given his sidekick seal of approval on my Radniks! And while I am aware that several of you have questioned my motives, especially in light of certain Shadow-y warnings, you can rest assured my motivations are...pure.
[He's not lying. Though what his motivations are 'purely' about is anyone's guess.]
And just to prove to you I've turned over a new engine...
[He lifts his gloved hand and makes several keystroke-like gestures. From offscreen a Motobug wheels itself in and places a box in the center.]
I've come with my newest product.
[He lifts the box to reveal...a model kit? It sure looks like a model kit.]
You see, my Radniks were so successful, I thought "Why stop there?" Why not encourage others to unlock their own potential! Foster the next generation of geniuses! And so, I present to you...Build-a-Bot!
This kit comes with every part necessary for you to build your own toys, complete with rudimentary programming chips that will teach you the fun of coding your own robotic arr–assistant!
[And Tails' expression starts to light up with his original enthusiasm again.] ... Huh. A DIY kit should be pretty fun and educational. Even someone with more mechanical experience could probably use it to help jumpstart their work with the local technology. This is actually kind of a cool idea, Eggman.
[With another keystroke gestures, an overlay appears over the TailsTube feed that looks suspiciously like a Home Shopping Network style layout. Except it is positively branded with Eggman.]
Now, act now and order your own Build-a-Bot kit, and I'll even throw in some spare chips for additional behavioral programming! It's a deal so good, you'd think I was crazy much less evil! And all proceeds go to me and my research. You know. For the...good. Of everyone. [Bah.]
With...of course a small stipend to sponsor this show. Small.
Negligible really.
[Speaking of the sponsorship — by this point, Tails isn't hiding his cranky expression about this arrangement, and is quickly tapping away at his shellphone.] Seriously, Eggman? Come on! This is not that kind of show! [With a few more taps... bloop! The overlay disappears, block by block, scrubbing all the rotten eggman branding off the screen.] And I only agreed to let you be a guest, not take over hosting duties...
Yes, yes! Of course! How presumptuous of me! You have my sincerest apologies!
[With a quick few airborne keystrokes of Eggman's other hand, some text flashes rapidly across the bottom of the screen at a blink-and-you'll-miss-it speed.]
"Build-a-Bot is a licensed product. Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik does not bear any responsibility for any weapons, doomsday devices, or robotic armies constructed using this product. This product is fully and comprehensively endorsed by SONIC THE HEDGEHOG and MILES "TAILS" PROWER and responsibility for their use or misuse falls solely on their furry heads."
Anyway — please send us your questions, so we can read and answer them live on stream! Or if you'd like, call in to ask them yourself!
Sender ID: SkyPatrol
To: Public
Subject: TailsTube: Episode 01 [LIVE!]
Warnings: bullying foxes
[The feed opens up to Tails' cabin on the Stormbringer. He's spent a bit of time and effort on getting it ready for the camera: Tools put away neatly on a pegboard, a few potted plants over here, some hand-drawn blueprints over there... the space still looks lived in, but mindfully so. And on top of it all, there's a banner reading "TAILSTUBE" pinned up on the wall behind him.]
[There's a moment's hesitation as the fox double-checks his shellphone, sees that it's recording properly, then backs up to fit in the camera's frame:]
Hey guys! Welcome to the inaugural episode of... TailsTube: Sea Fox Edition! [A quick jazz-hands towards the banner behind him!] Back home, TailsTube was my streaming channel, where I brought on the coolest guests I could find to hang out, answer your questions, and have some fun! Now, unfortunately, my setup here still needs a few upgrades before it can hold a candle to my original lab...
So, u-uh... [He pauses, clears his throat — summons up some willpower to say this next part with a smile.] This is also the first episode with a paid sponsor. And it's none other than Dr. Eggman himself!
... no one's more surprised about this than I am, guys.
[Normally, this is about the point where he would pull up some stunning, HQ art and graphics to add some context and flavor to the topic of discussion. But low-tech is the name of the game, and luckily, he's a fairly good artist. So, instead, he's standing up a poster display with drawings of Eggman's notorious creations, including various badniks, some weapons and obstacles, and his villainous pièce de résistance, the Death Egg.]
Back on our home world, Eggman's name is synonymous with terror and disaster. He's invented countless dangerous weapons and built an entire robotic military, which he's used in his many ill-fated plots to conquer our world! So, even though he's making peace with us for now, I can't help but be skeptical...
But on the other hand, if it is true? I'm actually kinda excited. Because Dr. Eggman does his best work when he's not trying to kill us.
[And here comes a second poster display, featuring some of the doctor's lesser known creations. For example, there's the E-Gear and a few other models of Extreme Gear, as well as some of his communication tech.]
And after looking over his new Radniks, I can say they seem like a step in the right direction. None of them come with any weapons, no animals are harmed in their creation or operation... even the code is pretty straightforward assistant stuff. So, if that's what we can expect going forward—
And that's where you're wrong, you twin-tailed toddler!
[The feed goes dark for a moment and there's a...well, it's a ruckus. Because Eggman has crashed the set of TailsTube and he's decided that now is his time to make an entrance. When the feed comes back, Eggman's taken a seat next to Tails. One leg crossed over the other, hands steepled in his lap. Where did he get that egg-shaped chair? He brought it. Don't ask questions. Especially if they're stupid.]
Since when have I ever given you anything you all 'expected?' The true hallmark of a genius is to subvert expectations! To shift paradigms! To—
[He turns to look at Tails' display and huffs disapprovingly.]
What are these? They look like they were drawn by a child. If you're going to showcase my work, at least put in effort.
[And Tails' fuzzy cheeks puff in his own disapproval at the critique. He put plenty of effort into it! ... but before the fox can get a word in edgewise, Eggman spins back around, sneering.]
Now, as I was saying! Tails here has given his sidekick seal of approval on my Radniks! And while I am aware that several of you have questioned my motives, especially in light of certain Shadow-y warnings, you can rest assured my motivations are...pure.
[He's not lying. Though what his motivations are 'purely' about is anyone's guess.]
And just to prove to you I've turned over a new engine...
[He lifts his gloved hand and makes several keystroke-like gestures. From offscreen a Motobug wheels itself in and places a box in the center.]
I've come with my newest product.
[He lifts the box to reveal...a model kit? It sure looks like a model kit.]
You see, my Radniks were so successful, I thought "Why stop there?" Why not encourage others to unlock their own potential! Foster the next generation of geniuses! And so, I present to you...Build-a-Bot!
This kit comes with every part necessary for you to build your own toys, complete with rudimentary programming chips that will teach you the fun of coding your own robotic arr–assistant!
[And Tails' expression starts to light up with his original enthusiasm again.] ... Huh. A DIY kit should be pretty fun and educational. Even someone with more mechanical experience could probably use it to help jumpstart their work with the local technology. This is actually kind of a cool idea, Eggman.
[With another keystroke gestures, an overlay appears over the TailsTube feed that looks suspiciously like a Home Shopping Network style layout. Except it is positively branded with Eggman.]
Now, act now and order your own Build-a-Bot kit, and I'll even throw in some spare chips for additional behavioral programming! It's a deal so good, you'd think I was crazy much less evil! And all proceeds go to me and my research. You know. For the...good. Of everyone. [Bah.]
With...of course a small stipend to sponsor this show. Small.
Negligible really.
[Speaking of the sponsorship — by this point, Tails isn't hiding his cranky expression about this arrangement, and is quickly tapping away at his shellphone.] Seriously, Eggman? Come on! This is not that kind of show! [With a few more taps... bloop! The overlay disappears, block by block, scrubbing all the rotten eggman branding off the screen.] And I only agreed to let you be a guest, not take over hosting duties...
Yes, yes! Of course! How presumptuous of me! You have my sincerest apologies!
[With a quick few airborne keystrokes of Eggman's other hand, some text flashes rapidly across the bottom of the screen at a blink-and-you'll-miss-it speed.]
"Build-a-Bot is a licensed product. Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik does not bear any responsibility for any weapons, doomsday devices, or robotic armies constructed using this product. This product is fully and comprehensively endorsed by SONIC THE HEDGEHOG and MILES "TAILS" PROWER and responsibility for their use or misuse falls solely on their furry heads."
Anyway — please send us your questions, so we can read and answer them live on stream! Or if you'd like, call in to ask them yourself!
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Admittedly, there have been some people I've found engaging here. It's nice to find people of some intellectual caliber rather than this...
Wonderful banter we find ourselves terminally locked in.
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Yes, well, after years of animosity between us, you'll have to forgive my skepticism.
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See how easy that was?
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I prefer to build back better.
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I do enjoy our little chats. It's tiring putting on airs all the time.
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I'm sure it is, especially when you're not used to having to be so nice all the time. Legit question here, how have you kept it up so long, hm?
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I don't understand. I've willingly tortured you for years.
That's our thing. I rise up and the rest of your fools thwart me. I come back with something bigger and more lethal.
You're telling me all of these years and you don't harbor any hatred?
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Anyways, no. I don't hate you, I just hate what you do. You're one of the smartest people I've ever met, and if you applied that intelligence where it mattered, you could do a whole lot of good in the world. But instead you continuously do stupid things and you hurt my friends and other people in the process.
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Well, this won't do at all. Honestly, I was operating under the assumption of mutual hatred. I'm not at all sure what to do with...
...this.
[Compliments???]
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[ Flatly: ]
But noooo, you just have to keep being stupid. Can't just be normal for once, can you? This is why none of us can ever have nice things. Idiot.
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Provided you're efficient enough with it.
So, it sounds like the obvious solution is to get you to hate me.
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You can try, but it won't work. I'm still gonna beat you into the surface of the sun, by the way, so you have that to look forward to at least.
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Not a single thing?
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I happen to like a challenge.
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Be careful what you wish for, Doctor.
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Consequences are a simple matter of action versus reaction.
But I digress. I don't particularly care for the fact that you don't hate me, Amy Rose.
Now, I wish to see how far I can press that conviction.
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Challenge accepted then, doctor. Every action has a consequence, and I hope you're ready to face the music if you take things too far. Sonic and Tails can only protect you for so long, you know.
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other avenues.
I do so enjoy our visits. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a toy empire to build!
Toodles~!
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[ Have a sickeningly sweet smile before the feed is cut~ ]