002 🔥 TEXT - WANTED: WRITER

[headhunt]

Type: Text
Sender ID: headhunt (Karlach)
To: Public
Subject: WANTED: WRITER
Warnings: N/A

need a writer. the kind who can do the big swirly letters with a quill on the parchment.

will pay good coin for services rendered.

contact karlach.


( is she aware she can use the network for more than job postings? it's unclear. )

Comments

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[Darin considers this question.]

"I, Karlach Cliffgate, henceforth referred to in this writ as Kanoodler, do hereby declare my intent to bed you, henceforth referred to in this writ as Kanoodlee. Upon acceptance of this missive, the Kanoodler will dictate the time and location where they might engage the Kanoodlee in intimate dealings not limited to..."

And then you list all of the stuff you wanna do.

[headhunt]

You know I wouldn't be saying "kanoodling".

( a pointed look.

but then she thinks about it for a little longer. )

. . .Would that be "fucker" and "fuckee"?

[forgeabettertomorrow]

I was trying to be polite. I'm a gentleman. I save the really good swears for the bedroom.

[And then he drops the pretext because this line of thinking is too funny to not explore.]

Okay, but I feel calling yourself "Fucker" in a notarized missive might be a hard sell. Comes on strong. There's gotta be a good middle ground.

[headhunt]

( if darin hadn't changed the subject, karlach might have taken them down a completely different conversational path. particularly about saving the "good" swears for the bedroom. )

If you write it fancy enough, you can say anything.

( warning: citation needed. )

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[Listen, she can always circle back.]

I'm pretty sure you, of all people, can say whatever you want and no one will stop you.

So, who's the lucky recipient? And how come you want to write something? You usually don't have any trouble just...putting it all out there. Honestly, one of my favorite things about you.

[headhunt]

It's about seduction.

( karlach reminds him with a smile and a dramatic flourish as she retrieves her shellphone again. )

Not looking to tell him how I feel. ( quick wave of the hand. ) He already knows.

( truly, it would be an impressive feat for him to not be aware. )

He's a fancy guy. Writing him a fancy letter is gonna get him hot and bothered.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Well...I don't know a single thing about being seductive...

But I think I'm pretty good with words. What's so fancy about him? Tell me about him!

[Darin hops up on the railing and leans forward with an eager grin.]

[headhunt]

( she laughs, warm and friendly. )

No shit.

( then she makes a motion to beckon him forward. )

C'mere.

( it takes a moment for her to swipe through a large swatch of completely inappropriate photographs before she lands on the inappropriate photo that she's willing to offer of her object of interest. )

This guy.

( karlach says as she turns her phone around to show darin the photo. )