shellphones | Text

i make a meen pancake i cud teach u

Pancakes, eggs, toast I can do.

[He may not be great at them, but the Organization's assassin had to fend for himself some of the time beyond instant snacks and communal meals.]

Beyond that

Huh.
Never tried to make much else.

Got anything more substantial?

gud start!

burgers? kind of incloods toast. can inclood egg. werk w/things u kno alredy.

Sure
See what you're gettin at

Meat tends to burn pretty easy though, right?

[As does.. most everything he tries to cook. Ugh.]

What if I were just to relearn some basics?

good good

it can, butt if u do smash burg it's ok if it burns a lil.

[Blitzø has some fire problems, himself. This cooking endeavor is either going to be a great success or a literal flaming nightmare.]

nut a bad place 2 start! wut kind of basics u want

I could probably teach someone the basics, at least.

[ It might be a good distraction from all the other things that have been going on, if nothing else. ]

...I know enough about it. But I can try to teach others.

[Cooking between ~~a literal imp from hell and the pyromaniac husk of a 16 year old who died and stuck around a near decade anyway~~ two perfectly normal guys? Surely this won't incur any accidental arson charges!]

Right. Okay

[Smash???]

How about
Timing?
How do you personally tell when is something is done vs
charred past perfection?

Oh yeah?
Whaddiya know?

[He'll bite. Any bit of advice is good advice at this point.]

You're a riftfarer right?

[He doesn't think the locals have access to the same shellphone channels, anyway.]

Are they something you already knew or a skill you picked up while here.

Oh yeah? Well spill

[This person both seems more and somehow less confident than half the others who had answered.]

What kinda things do ya like to make?

It depends. I know I sometimes like to cook spicy seafood stuff but other times I can make some soup if anyone needs something quick.

[Said the boy who had to make quick easy meals during missions.]

[What's a little arson between friends!!]

[And yes smash, the bonus effect of smashing a burger makes the fire more exciting because you've already started releasing tension by smashing a ball of meat!]

[No really nothing could possibly go wrong here at all.]

smash burg r also eezier there
once they crisp up a lil on the edges the meet shud b cookd enuff
plus burg can be a lil undercooked.
kind of of an eyeballing thing? i can show ya.

Know what
That's more than I can make
I'll take it

[Those sound close enough to actual dishes and that's good enough!]

Any chance I could visit your crew's kitchen next time you do
Or
I don't know
If you'd wanna turn on video and walk through some steps?

[Though something about this speech pattern does seem oddly familiar, even if he hasn't placed the username yet.]

Yeah?

[Axel sucks a breathe in; shame might be too close to an emotion for a Nobody to experience but the redhead can still lament whatever this exchange is going to do to the memory of his dignity. Guess they're really doing this.]

You got some kitchen in mind or we just talking video?

Um....I'm happy with whatever you want to do. Whatever makes you comfortable or learn better.

[Because the important thing is for Axel to learn!!]

Your kitchen then.

[He gets to set the pace? Well all right then, he can work with this.]

I'll supply whatever you need. Shoot me a list.

[..if he botches it, at least they won't be eating the cost.]

You need something chopped or whatever you want
Just tell me what to do and I'll do it.

[Maybe it will be objectively less horrible as long as someone else is calling the shots.]

we shud totely find an emptee apartmint or sth
teknikly mine izn't mine 2 invite ppl 2

[....Huh, that wasn't something he was used to. He gets to be the one who decides on what they could make? For a moment, he didn't say anything and found himself wondering what easy dish they could make.]

That depends. Is there any preference on what you want to make? Do you want soup? Or anything spicy? Or perhaps something that is a little sour or sweet?

I'm a riftfarer, and I knew the basics and how to make healthy fare for cheap back home. It's all a little harder without my modern kitchen, I'll admit.

[ But he's managing alright. ]

i've picked up a bit from helping out aunt cass with the lucky cat cafe, but that's more baking than actual cooking. but you're not wrong. we probably should do something about meals more. baymax keeps reminding me i can't live off of gummi bears and keep getting too distracted to eat.

Ah I get that
Mine isn't quite open either.

[Even if Plus Ultra were pretty lax on visitors part of this was about finding a way to practice this away from the rest of his crew.

Then again...]

I might know a place.
You a Corsair?

[What's a bit of breaking and entering in the pursuit of learning?]

Yeah they don't make things easy

[He probably WOULD still be eating more instant meals if they were more accessible.]

I never had much reason to learn
But no time like the present, am I right?

You got a favorite thing to make?

Hmm
Sour or sweet could be good? We like spice but one of us already makes a decent curry.
And

I'm not sure I'm the best judge of how much is too much.
There some way to tell?

That's not on you. I'm the lone adult on this ship
Much as I don't like to admit it.
I should be providing more

[They just don't make remedial courses for dead guys who spent ten years working for a cult instead of learning proper life skills.]

Besides. I can't send you all out to perform your heroics on an empty stomach.

I mean baking is still kinda like cooking

I suppose it'll be based on taste. As long as it doesn't make anyone upset, it should be okay.

But that depends on people's spice tolerance. I know I can handle most spices.

[Unlike his brother and sister, he can handle spices like a champ!]

but if we all pitch in with meals, it'll be easier? right? so it isn't just on one person. and we can all learn. at least some basics. i can do some basic recipes, but nothing that amazing. mostly snacks, really. since aunt cass usually cooks. or we get takeout.

I learned when I was pretty young, but that's right.

I like making curry, and it's usually a hit with everyone else. Easy to use whatever happens to be for cheap that day, too.

probs wudn't bee hard 2 make stol think he set his kichin on fire butt
wud also rather nut do that.

izzat how u spell the fancy werd 4 pirate cuz yes i am that

[Absolutely nothing could go wrong here at all.]

Same here
Sora too I think
I mean I know about tolerance
I just thought

if there was more to it than that?
for the average person

I guess the baseline otherwise is just making sure you can see the food that's still underneath, right?
haha

but nevermind that

yeah let's try something sweet n sour
whatever you got to teach I'm game

Name the time and place

Hey snacks are important!
Never underestimate a good snack!

Heh but guess you got me there

All right
if you teach me what you know about baking
I'll tell you what I learn about turning some ingredients into actual grub
We'll swap and share

Maybe we can rope some others into learning something as a group.

[Which sounds like a chaotic, loud mess waiting to happen but what about their crew isn't?]

Oh we got curry down pat.
Not that it hurts to known different kinds I guess.

[Thanks to Beat though, it's the one thing they didn't go hungry with.]

Got anything that makes use of fish?

[As much as they lived off the sea, there were surprisingly few ways they knew how to prepare what came out of it.]

Then how about a sweet and sour fish soup? We'll just need to add some ingredients for the soup and it should be okay.

How about later today at 2pm and my house? Would that work for you?

yeah? i guess we can. i'm not the best, but. living with aunt cass, i've picked up some things over the years getting her to make cookies or brownies with me. that sort of thing.

can't hurt. if the others want to learn. i don't mind trying to help out. especially when it will get baymax to stop complaining about how many gummi bears i eat while snacking and working.

[Yes, < laminitis >. That. Axel chuckles to himself.]

Just checking how serious you are about those kinda comments

[A Paladin he might have some concern about dragging into 'well-intentioned' crime but well, if Axel knows one connection between Corsairs..]

Then lets just say I know a bar or two in Nogard currently out of commission.

[But hey, bars have kitchens, right? And he did his research back when he helped organize that Tavern brawl. No harm in messing up a place already messed up?]

I'll shoot you coordinates sometime, if you're game.

Sure! Sounds great
Send me the coordinates and I'll be there.

[Oh wait. The problem with doing this online with nothing but usernames to go by.]

There someone I should ask for?

Yes, you can ask for Freminet.

[Meanwhile here is him sending said coordinates]

[He WOULD leave the horse disease as his fucking shellphone name.]

seerius as the grayv buddy

oh fuck yes i am so gaym

I know a few ways to make seafood palatable, yes. Ate a lot of it back home, too.

[Though he didn't enjoy having kitchen duty at the Parish nearly as much as cooking other things when he felt like it. ]

Good
You'll know how it should taste!
Then let's go with that

All right
How do you wanna do this?

You got someplace to meet or
would you rather just talk through video sometime?

Might be easier if I see what you've got to work with.

Eh don't you worry about that part
We had a cook before and their stuff was left behind
If there's something you think I need, I'll find a way to get it.

[Ingredients, tools and all. He is a Corsair, he knows how to acquire things-- even if he prefers to do it legally rather than compensating for borrowing it later. Gotta set a good example as Team Babysitter.]

I can use our kitchen but somewhere you're familiar with might be better.
If I have to find somewhere I will.

[Of course, if he's just following on video than it doesn't really matter which of them is broadcasting from where.]

You just tell me what you need for it
And I'll make it work

In person seems a little simpler than trying to show everything I'm doing through here.

[ Possibly an odd combination: He's used to a more modern kitchen than anything here, but he's still not especially used to using the network. ]

My place is a little small for visitors, though.

[ And he's not that comfortable with ones he doesn't know well, but he doesn't say that. ]

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sorry for slow!