Superstitions Smoocherstitions!

[book2thehead]

Type: Video
Sender ID: book2thehead (Shikanoin Heizou)
To: General Public
Subject: Drunk Detectives Dunk On Dumb Delusions
Warnings: beware of alcohol, kids

[It's that once in a blue moon time where Heizou makes a public appearance on the network. And it becomes quite clear why once the feed comes on: his face is quite pink and he has a big cheeky grin on his face and a bottle of wine in the hand that isn't holding the camera. So... Yeah, he appears to be drunk.

He also appears to be outside somewhere, despite how late it is. And he is also not alone! Beside him there appears to be one (1) Sherlock Holmes, currently laying down on his seat with his feet up in the air and his head dangling over the edge. He is also attempting to play his violin from this position, for.... some reason. Science? Science.

Either way, the video feed turns on to the sound of Heizou giggling and Sherlock's violin playing. And Heizou trying to figure out what position he needs to be sitting in to send out his Very Important Message. He finds it eventually, with the shellphone angled so that both he and Sherlock are in frame - or at least Sherlock's feet are - and he addresses his invisible audience with an even bigger grin.]

Ah-- Here! Helloooo one and all~! Your friendly local detective agency has decided to take on the mysteeeerious case of.... Sailor superstitions~! That is right my dear rift-jumping fellows, we've even decided to do this one pro bono! That means freeeee~

[There's a moment of fumbling the camera, and once it settles Heizou is holding the camera out at arm's length to reveal where he and Sherlock are: what appears to be a fake boat, crudely built and sitting on land (so to speak) like a playground for children. Did they find this? Did they drunkenly grab chairs and tables and bits of wood to build it themselves? Who knows. But it sure is... vaguely boat-shaped.]

Now as you can see here, the great Mr. Sherlock Holmes and yours truly are currently on board a boat! And as you can also see- [He tilts his head down slightly so that the camera gets a better angle on all his burgundy-colored hair.] -my hair is quite red! But have we run into any bad luck on our voyage? Nooope~! Aaaand POOF! Myth busted!

[At this point Sherlock chimes in drunkenly from off-screen:]

Heizou, did we test all the ways to swirl the alcohol? Did we forget one? [Since obviously up and down is an option-] The taste didn't change at all!

[Someone should... probably stop them. Or maybe join them! Decisions, decisions...]

Comments

[empyrean_mirror]

That's not true! You're just looking at the wrong things. Aren't you supposed to be a detective?

[He's SO easy to read wdym Heizou just watch the sprout--]

[book2thehead]

[Heizou just laughs again, twirling his fingers in the air and making more little teal particles appear around them. Even leaving some glowy lines that only last for a second, as he draws a vague shape of a leaf.]

Senpai, you're mixing up expressiveness and being readable! I may be able to read the signs, but that doesn't mean he draws his emotions plainly upon his face~

[empyrean_mirror]

You're looking at the wrong part of his face, then. And it's hardly just me. Watch him talk to Sherlock sometime.

[Because it's painfully obvious Alhaitham has a fondness for their wayward victorian.]

[book2thehead]

[He lets out a little sigh and barely resists the urge to roll his eyes. He's still just drunk enough to keep a smile on his face, even if it does fade just a bit.]

That simply proves what I know that you know I already know! I've told you before, it's really okay for him to not like us~

[empyrean_mirror]

I was talking about his expressiveness in general, you have now changed the topic.

But you want to see what dislike actually looks like on the man, go ask him about the Hive Mind case sometime.

[book2thehead]

[Kaveh... You forget that this man has been drinking much more than he usually ever does.]

Mmm. Even if he is as expressive as you say, the fact remains that I'll never get to see for myself~

[He then closes his eyes and lets out a deep sigh, like he's suddenly tired.]

Hahh... At least Sherlock understands.

[empyrean_mirror]

Have you let anyone but Sherlock understand?

[Kaveh's tone is dry and a little biting, but he's frustrated.]

[book2thehead]

[There's a dry, humorless laugh. Looks like the drunken giddiness is fading fast now that the subject is changing.]

Why would I? They'd just leave in the end... Sherlock knows.

[empyrean_mirror]

They can't stay if you don't let them, Heizou, that's--

[Kaveh stops. Pinches the bridge of his nose. Heizou's too drunk for this. Hopefully he won't remember this in the morning, but--]

You've made a lot of assumptions of me, assuming I wouldn't know exactly what you're talking about. Go drink some water.

[book2thehead]

They're not assumptions. Twice is a "coincidence." More than that is a pattern...

[And I'm the common denominator. Drunk Heizou is honest, not naive. And it isn't often that he gets blackout drunk, so the odds of him remembering all this are still pretty good.]

...You should return to your husband, Mr. Architect. Sherlock and I are quite busy~

[Upon which he promptly hangs up.]

text; un: paradisaea

[empyrean_mirror]

It happened more than twice.

Drink water or I'm calling Freminet to bring it to you.

voice | un: astudyinviolet

[astudyinviolet]

They can leave even if you've let them in.

[ Like Jon did. And Alfyn is gone too. And his mother, and... Sherlock can keep going. ]

[empyrean_mirror]

Anyone can leave at any time--death is indiscriminate. Is the risk not worth the love? Go drink some water.

[HE IS GOING TO COME FORCE FEED YOU WATER IF HE HAS TO.]

voice

[book2thehead]

[Heizou's hung up on his end, but he can certainly be heard somewhere behind Sherlock.]

There are worse things than death.... Sherry, didn't we have another bottle..?

[empyrean_mirror]

PUT IT DOWN.

[Oh my god, is this what Tighnari has to deal with? He's mailing an apology through the rifts.]

[astudyinviolet]

Indeed there are fates worse than death. Sometimes you can't even die. Sometimes those who leave purposely break things on the way out.

[ So, Sherlock might be also thinking of a certain artist, but that is half leaving, half kicking him out the door. ]

Did we have more? I didn't think we had that many to test...

[empyrean_mirror]

I'm coming up there.

[astudyinviolet]

There's no superstition about blonds and ships.

[empyrean_mirror]

Then I'll make an excellent control group, Sherlock.

[Control of MAKING YOU SOBER UP.]

[astudyinviolet]

Do you want to try the superstition about swirling alcohol and changing the taste? Perhaps you can find something we missed.

[ But if he's sober, then he's going to focus too much on sad things instead of bouncing around from topic to topic as his crowded mind palace lacks order and a filter. ]

[indispensable]

[Wow why do you have to keep exposing him like this.]