text | Free Toe Ring

[emet_sulk]

Type: Text
Sender ID: emet-sulk
To: Public
Subject: Free Toe Ring
Warnings: None besides the nature of the uh. toe ring (Game's A Foot) being what it is.

If there is anyone with a penchant for feet who would take this ridiculous toe ring off my hands then I would be much obliged.

[ He attaches an image of the toe ring, which was his reward from completing the investigation into the brothel's lockbox. ]

Comments

text; un:catsgothistongue

[catsgothistongue]

... And by a 'penchant for feet', you mean...?

[emet_sulk]

Do you like feet enough to want to worship them in the bedroom?

[ After Cloud's obliviousness, he's just going to spell it out for her. ]

[catsgothistongue]

[what the fuck did he just read?]

No, why the hell would I...?

somehow I always thought Ranma was fem oops

[emet_sulk]

That is what the ring is for.

LOL you're good.

[catsgothistongue]

I can read! I know what it does. I just don't know who'd be screwed up in the head bad enough to take something like that.

[And now we're kinkshaming people, Ranma.]

[emet_sulk]

Some like breasts. Some like buttocks. And some, as it so happens, like feet. Is it truly so hard to imagine?

I'm sure you have your own preferences.

[catsgothistongue]

None of which include being a foot fetishist.

[emet_sulk]

Well, now I'm curious! What DO you like then, hmm?

[catsgothistongue]

I'm into a thing called nunya. It goes hand-in-hand with business.

[emet_sulk]

What in Zodiark's name is 'nunya'?

[ Forgive this old man for not understanding the joke. ]

[catsgothistongue]

What in nunya's name is 'Zodiark'?

[Okay boomer.]

[emet_sulk]

Zodiark is my god. Is that what your 'nunya' is?

(1/2)

[catsgothistongue]

(2/2)

[catsgothistongue]

[He didn't know if he should be dumbfounded or be laughing out loud.]

Say 'nunya' out loud, with business added at the end.

1/2

[emet_sulk]

[ Take pity on this serious old boomer. ]

2/2

[emet_sulk]

I see. 'Twas a jest, then.

[catsgothistongue]

You just now pieced it together?

[emet_sulk]

The medium of text performs poorly when conveying sarcasm.

[catsgothistongue]

... Fair point. It's harder to come across words on a screen than in-person.

[Someone needs to teach them tone indicators.]

[emet_sulk]

Well, putting that aside, the captain of the crew I am a part of claimed this ring rather quickly. So I suppose we know where his preferences lie.

[catsgothistongue]

And this captain is...?

[emet_sulk]

Dongfang Qingcang, I believe his name is. A bit of a mouthful, I know.

[catsgothistongue]

[Emet-Selch wouldn't get a response for... a long while, only seeing '...' buffering in and out.

This is cause Ranma is too busy laughing his ass off right now.]

[emet_sulk]

[ After an appropriate amount of time passing where Emet-Selch would have expected a reply (yet receives none), he types again: ]

Do you know the man?

[catsgothistongue]

[Forgive him, he takes an extra minute to catch his breath, he might've choked a bit while laughing.]

I met him, yeah. Suddenly it makes a lot more sense. He seems like the type of egotistical prick who'd make people grovel, worship the ground he walks on and lick his feet.