01 Video: Une Introduction

[triompheduhimbo]

Type: Video!
Sender ID: triompheduhimbo | Napoleon Bonaparte
To: Public
Subject: Napoleon's been here long enough, time to introduce himself!
Warnings: LOUD. French. Possible talking about war and Fate Series magic bullshit

BONJOUR, TOUTE LE MONDE!!

[Sorry if you were scrolling your phones and suddenly had a loud, baritone voice coming from your shellphone speakers, the voice able to carry through the door and out the window--

If you had gotten over the surprise/shock/fear response, the video feed would show a tall man in what looks like a miliaty outfit (--was it ill fitting? that vest/shirt didn't cover his chest well--), a wide grin on his face and a cheerful look in his eye. Don't mind the odd chocolate coloured cat with huge ears and green cross eyes that was circling around his legs, it's fine.]

Now that I've gotten your attention!

[Offering the camera a wave--]

The names Napoleon Bonaparte--First Emperor of France, Servant of Chaldea, Archer Class Heroic Spirt-- I've recently shown up here and after a bit of exploring, figured I should introduce myself! So far most people don't know who I am--

[He'd tilt his head to one side, a more serious (pouty?) expression on his face while closing his eyes--]

Which is still weird as hell, I gotta say, but they're not from the world I'm from, so I won't hold it against them, haha!

[Opening his eyes again, that more relaxed expression would come back--]

I do wanna see, though, if anyone from Earth is here-- and if anyone from Chaldea, be it other Servants or the staff are around? I don't feel Maître anywhere, despite our contract still being intact so I don't think they're here, but hey, I've definitely been wrong before!

[A brief military salute, with that same smile, as the chocolate brown cat started making a honking meow--]

A bientôt!

Comments

you'll need it because you're stuck here forever

[indispensable]

[Wow don't call him out in public like this.]

You certainly didn't bother to hide it back then.

[You chose him, senior. So choose him.]

avert your eyes, freminet

[empyrean_mirror]

[Kaveh snorts, and starts to crowd Alhaitham against the kitchen counter, his tone growing very light and teasing.]

Oh, is someone feeling in need of attention? Do I need to remind you who's constellation is on my very core, Haitham?

[Still here. Still watching. Wondering if he should cut in...]

[triompheduhimbo]

[--Wait, were they going to start making out or something even more explicit...? Uuuuh...]

closes all the eyes of the children watching

[indispensable]

[Alhaitham very notably allows Kaveh to do all of this, his own eyes bright and alight with challenge and daring, as if almost taunting the other.]

Maybe you are the one who needs the reminder. [Don't mind his hands automatically coming up to rest them onto Kaveh's hips.] Something to ensure that you remember your choices well.

[empyrean_mirror]

I didn't forget...are you so worried I will? When have I ever broken my promises?

[He laughs a little, pretty much right against Alhaitham's lips, and takes his face in his hands.]

You should just be honest when you're feeling needy, Haitham. I won't deny your heartfelt sincerity this time.

[indispensable]

[Kaveh's laugh draws out a huff from Alhaitham as he leans into the touch, though he notably does not say anything about doing so.]

I should remind you that I only came over because I heard you making a fuss. [Not that it changes anything, really. As long as his husband calls for him, he will always come without a doubt.]

[empyrean_mirror]

Well, if you don't need my attention, then, I can just go back to making lunch...

[It's an empty threat and they both know it.]

[indispensable]

[Lets out a contemplative hum.]

Is that the extent of what my husband is willing to give me? Such a tragedy.

[Really, how is this a balanced marriage? Husband clearing it just giving the talk and not doing the walk.]

[empyrean_mirror]

Tch, what's a tragedy is how weak that bait is--

[He says that, but it still worked, since he just leaned the rest of the way in to kiss this damn man senseless before he can retort. >:T!!!]

[indispensable]

[There is very much no more argument from Alhaitham here once Kaveh starts kissing him, because he's busy kissing back in turn and giving it as good as he gets. In fact it doesn't take long at all before he's tightening his hold on Kaveh's hips to pull him in until their bodies are fully flush against each other, where then one hand dips even lower, beginning to slide over the curve of a perfect ass—

An interruption may be necessary before this escalates further.]

[triompheduhimbo]

Ahem~

[Just going to gently clear his throat. Still a smile on his face, though a bit of a smirk now...]

I realise I said I was the Emperor of France, but I didn't expect that to lead to frenching right infront of me, oh là là~!

[empyrean_mirror]

[Well.

At least he doesn't shriek this time. Mostly because he choked and started violently coughing, sorry!

He can't shut the video off while he's wheezing so like, it's up to you, Alhaitham!]

[indispensable]

[Alhaitham flinches as well, though for him its less off the third party interruption and more of the way Kaveh had jerked back and then started to choke violently.

He takes a second to attend to his husband first, patting his back and looking to make sure that he isn't going to actually die anytime soon, and once he's assured of it looks over to where Mehrak is—or more specifically, the Shellphone that the toolbox is so helpfully holding.

His eyes narrow then, a dangerous light flashing within them, the much more pleasant mood he'd been in dissipating quickly as the arm he has around Kaveh tightens imperceptibly.]

Mehrak.

[His voice is quiet but sharp, and there's a responding BEEP as the toolbox heeds his call, floating over until it's close enough for Alhaitham to grab the Shellphone from it—

—and ends the feed immediately with no warning whatsoever.]

[triompheduhimbo]

[ --Well, at least he got them to cut themselves off before they leaked a sex tape over the network. Sheesh, and he thought Queen Medb could be bad at times... ]

[ Hopefully this doesn't come back to bite him? ]

[empyrean_mirror]

[>Kaveh and Alhaitham will remember this.]

[triompheduhimbo]

[Ah. Merde.]