Video | Best fwends

[acheat]

Type: Video
Sender ID: acheat (Jarlaxle)
To: Public
Subject: Surprise Gifting
Warnings: None now!

[The video opens to... No one? No one! It's no one. It's an apartment, not really decorated, looks like someone clearly lives here but as to who that's hard to say. The way the camera moves though, it suggests that however it's being held, it's not necessarily in someone's hand.

There's no noise, no commentary, but briefly a hand does actually appear on screen, holding something. A hat, apparently. A wide brimmed straw hat with a cute little ribbon around it, and into that ribbon has been neatly tucked a big, shiny, blue and green peacock feather. The hat is turned this way and that for a moment, to allow the audience to really appreciate just how stupid the whole thing is, before it's pulled off screen again, and the camera bearer begins to move.

The footsteps are silent, not a single noise to be had, not a click not a thump not even the whisper of fabric or indeed the sound of the camera man's breathing. It's almost eerie, how fluidly and soundlessly he's actually moving here, one might almost imagine the camera was just being dangled by a string somehow and just being flown around this apartment. From one room to the next it moves at a steady, even pace, until at last, the target is spotted.

It's Kimmuriel, back to the camera man, by all appearances deep within the depths of a book. Or notes, it's actually hard to tell from this angle. Slowly, quietly, the camera creeps closer. Easily, gently, the hat is produced with theatrical slowness.

Then carefully, oh so carefully, oh so agonizingly slow, from a solid two feet up, the hat bearing hand begins it's decent, not a single tremor to be seen in the arm nor wrist nor fingers. Closing in on Kimmuriel's bowed head, closer... closer... closer-

And an inch away he just straight up drops it right on the psionicists head.]

I made you a present!

[And yes he had to share this moment with everyone it's important actually!!!]

Comments

action

[psionicmolotov]

Jarlaxle! [ He'd been wondering where that hat went, mostly because Tinydancer was too small to steal it (probably) and that only meant stupidity was afoot. Now he has his answer, and also his suspicions are thoroughly confirmed. He swipes at the hat as it lands, succeeding only in having it land crookedly on his head and slide over his eyes.

He now looks even more ridiculous. He pushes up the hat so he can see Jarlaxle properly, closing his book with a snap. ]

--Are you recording this?

[acheat]

[The cackling is as loud as it is juvenile.]

You look lovely! As I thought this was an excellent idea.

[The shellphone is, of all places, on his fucking head, haphazardly held in place on the top of the hat with twine, carefully wrapped around the band at the base. It's an extremely slapdash setup, one good shake will get it to topple. Which, it immediately does as he steps back, clattering loudly to the floor.]

Well not anymore!

[psionicmolotov]

[ He sighs in exasperation, his expression clearly displeased, but he keeps the hat - with its ridiculous and flamboyant feather - on for the moment. Jarlaxle did, after all, sneak up on him - perhaps the only person here who could do so. He supposes he can permit this much. ] Was it worth that absurdity?

[ He gestures at the shellphone, still tangled up in twine and now on the floor.
He's not getting that for you, clean up your own mess. ]

[acheat]

[The smug, self-satisfied smile might just be a good enough reply on his own, and he follows Kimmuriel's hand down towards the twine wrapped phone. He takes a step to scoop it up, picking the twine off it or at least, mostly off it, mostly out of the way...

Before pulling it up to aim the camera at Kimmuriel. He needs a picture!]

Yes, absolutely.

[He's so proud of himself!]

[psionicmolotov]

[ Kimmuriel, without even the slightest change in his expression, flicks his fingers. The shellphone practically leaps out of Jarlaxle's hands, propelled by psionic energy.

He doesn't take the hat off, though. If Jarlaxle wants a picture, fine. But he'll have to work for it. ]

[acheat]

[Whoop! He does actually jump a little as the phone just yeets itself right out of his hand, mere seconds before he could actually snap that picture. Drat. ... The fact that Kimmuriel has not removed the hat hasn't escaped his attention though.

Oh it's a game is it? Temporary, fleeting and idle surprise is quickly turning into open delight, his movements easy, light and casual as he saunters over to the phone, eying Kimmuriel as he reaches down to pick it back up again. Let's play some games then.]

[psionicmolotov]

[ Despite Kimmuriel's lack of expression in this case, it does indeed appear to be a game rather than a temporary annoyance.

He waits for Jarlaxle to pick up the phone before he cuts a door into the air and steps through, vanishing from sight. However, unlike Jarlaxle, he is not so skilled at stealth, so his attempt to get the jump on his co-captain from behind and slap the shellphone out of his hand once more is betrayed by his quick footsteps and the rustle of his clothing.

He does give it a good attempt though. He could end the game easily by relying on his powers alone, but then it wouldn't be a good game, would it? ]

voice;

[empyrean_mirror]

[Don't laugh. Don't laugh. DO NOT laugh. Don't. Donut. Don't.

Kaveh...coughs slightly. He's fine.]

...Did you get him a present or are you defusing a trap?

voice;

[acheat]

Ah Kahveh! How good it is to hear you again, how is everything?

To answer your question: Yes.

voice;

[empyrean_mirror]

I'm doing...[He pauses. Thinks of the shit he's been getting into. Elects to discuss none of it.] Fine.

[The response makes him giggle, though. Oh...that's kinda nostagic...] Oh, it's like that, is it?

voice;

[acheat]

Just fine? I think we could do better than that, if you're looking to improve your day.

It's-

[There's a thump, his voice dimming for a second. After a brief moment of silence, there's a sudden scrape and scuffle, the rustle of clothes, and then a burst of loud and uncontrollable laughter as the camera sound rapidly fires off.

Another brief pause... and he continues, slightly breathless.]

A very delicate operation, really.

voice;

[empyrean_mirror]

Should we be listening to this, Jarlaxle?

[Like. Sir. Sir what are you two doing.]

There's no need to concern yourself with me, while you two are occupied. I just have some adjusting to do.

voice;

[acheat]

Listening to Kimmuriel try to break my shellphone and avoid having his picture taken? Well you certainly don't have to!

I'll surely be kicked out of the apartment eventually, I won't be occupied for overlong I can't imagine.

Video; un: subigito

[subigito]

[ Astarion replies with video instead of voice without realizing it since Jarlaxle has posted with video. But it's like the camera has an incredibly difficult time capturing his image at all. It's extremely blurry at best and nonexistent at worse. ]

Well done! Outfoxing even someone of Kimmuriel's talents is no small feat.

Video; private

[acheat]

[He peers at the foggy, semi-visible figure on screen for a moment, it has to the the voice that ultimately identifies just who he's speaking with. Oh, well then, that would make sense actually, wouldn't it?]

It takes time and effort, but it can be done. Most don't get the chance to practice though.

[It's mostly a one chance only deal with anyone else, you don't live long enough to try again. But for Astarion's sake, lest anyone be paying attention and have any measure of education about vampires, the call is quickly switched to private. Plausible deniability can be easily applied to those first few seconds, maybe the camera was just greasy.]

You're recording yourself, you know.

[subigito]

Time and effort and an assortment of magical items, perhaps?

[ I mean he's helped Jarlaxle undress he knows he's got accessories for days.

He swaps over to voice at the comment though. Whoops! ]

It's not my fault these things just default to whatever they're responding to!

[acheat]

Which also took time and effort to procure so really, if one looks at it like that, it's time and effort all the way down.

[He's having a great time right now, it's fully silly hours over here.]

I've ensured our privacy, there's no need to be concerned. An easy oversight to make, I honestly didn't even think about how you'd appear over the devices, I would have just assumed that to be merely mirrors.

[subigito]

Of course. I couldn't diminish your accomplishments.

[ his tone is light, teasing. ]

It would be nice if it could work, wouldn't it? I'd fill my shellphone with pictures of myself.

[acheat]

It would be nearly impossible to accomplish.

I'm sure you could commission a portrait, couldn't you? You'd look stunning, you know. Quite regal in a gold frame, you could hang it up over the mantle as a lord would.

voice; id: partybabysitter

[partybabysitter]

It is a lovely present.

[ He's serious, naturally! ]

I have not had the experience to observe such masterful sneaking before. What a unique experience you have shared with us this day, Jarlaxle.

voice;

[acheat]

Complimentary as always! Please you're going to make me blush, Xenk.

[Not really, but the laughter in his tone conveys nothing but joy and good humor here.]

Never underestimate the utility of a good set of boots, that's the advice I'll offer you today, should you ever decide to improve upon your stealth.

voice;

[partybabysitter]

I say only what I mean, my friend.

[ You know he does. ]

Stealth does not suit me, with my armor, but I will trust that your word is true. Perhaps a new set of boots would not be remiss, regardless.

voice;

[acheat]

It entirely depends on the boot, I can assure you. Perhaps you ought to work on your stealth, armor be damned. You'll never know when it'll suit you to sneak about somewhere.

I could give you a few lessons, you know.

[partybabysitter]

Could you?

[ Is he interested because it would be a new skill, or because he'd get to spend time with Jarlaxle? Definitely both. ]

I much doubt that I would have any proficiency in it, but a lesson may not be out of the question.

[acheat]

It would be nothing quite as advanced as the display you just received today, I can assure you. That would take far more than a few lessons to teach, regardless of how intelligent and adept the pupil is. But a few tricks learned here and there wouldn't hurt, would it?

Why, I'd even do it for free, the payment would simply be the reward of spending more time with my favorite paladin.