text / image/ video; wings of feathers, tails, and fin tips

[hyperviolence]

Type: text / image / video
Sender ID: hyperviolence (Gojo Satoru)
To: public
Subject: this is not a holiday, Satoru!
Warnings: possibly language, tbd

[snapshots of Gojo with little crabs, little crabs and Toge, Toge's pinched red hands and little crabs, Gojo and Toge, little crabs, a rock no crabs, crabs on Gojo's sunglasses, the sky, the sea, indistinguishable foliage, enraged face of a paladin, bruised face of said paladin, Gojo's grinning face.]

Look at my cute student! I'm recruiting these little crabs.

[video of Gojo's face, with his bandage covering only one eye.]

Oi, I'm looking for a grumpy skinny man of Russian descent, I believe. Fyoho Doshshishs something. If you see this, ring me up or reply here or send an express borscht. Ta!

Comments

video

[fatalism]

[ there is the grumpiest, most irritated looking russian face on the camera. he's somewhere where there is little light because...of course he is. ]

Dostoevsky. What do you want?

[ any borscht gojo may or may not get in future will be laced with poison. ]

i'm not getting notifs for this :|

[hyperviolence]

There you are! That's what I said.

[look at that annoyingly pleased face.]

You just disappeared after the tattoo. I thought I'd hallucinated you.

how dare notifs get in our way :|

[fatalism]

You mean you wished you hallucinated me, but I am very sorry to inform you that no. I am very much still here.

[ oh my god why is this man making all of fyodor's carefully cultivated patience go out the window ]

No bruises on your face, I take it you've learned to control your tongue a little?

[hyperviolence]

Why would I wish that? You're my little tattoo buddy now, aren't you? I'm sure the Ocotopus will be happy to see us again.

Not at all. Just the little wonders of the tattoo. Where did you run off to anyway?

1/2

[fatalism]

[ ugh don't remind him, he wants to jab you with a knife, gojo!!! ]

2/2

[fatalism]

didn't he put a sign saying we're not allowed back in?

[ ok so maybe fyodor had gone back or tried to go change his tattoo ]

if this is the sense of humor of the inhabitants of this world, it leaves much to be desired.

nowhere in particular. where did you run off to?

Text; id: chatterbox

[cursedwords]

I'm adorable. I didn't know you were planning on spreading those around.

[ He's kidding about the adorable thing. ]

[hyperviolence]

You look too cute to be kept from the public.
Do you mind?

[cursedwords]

Not really, it's fine. I'm just surprised.

[hyperviolence]

We don't get enough fun moments like this back home.
Might as well make the most of it here.

[cursedwords]

I solemnly swear I haven't done homework in months.
Especially not since coming here. [ Ha. That's Kusakabe's problem now. ]
You're right about that though, no curses I've had nothing but time to hang out and do what I want.

[hyperviolence]

You little rascal, you'll make Kusakabe-san bitch even more.

Have you been to the beach?
I want to lie on a beach somewhere nice.

[cursedwords]

I'm not failing, it's fine. [ Is it though?? ]

I've been on a beach. Hunting bounties and things like that.
I was with another crew before and I was working as the only cook so I was really busy.

[hyperviolence]

[ not failing is better than failing, and better is always good! (who let this man become a teacher? who??) ]

Was it a nice beach?
It doesn't have to be Okinawa pretty.
Though if you know of one that is, please do share.
Or come with.

[cursedwords]

[ His academic prowess isn't very high, but frankly it doesn't have to be. As long as he accomplishes what the Elders want they're not actually going to fail him anyway. ]

I guess so? I didn't really spend time on the beach. We got into a boat and went out.
I don't really swim. Almost drowned the other day when I messed up my training and got knocked overboard. [ Ranma yeeted him off the deck. ]
I'll let you know if I hear anything.

[hyperviolence]

[ academia doesn't rank very high, it's true. since Toge isn't planning on running away like Nanami way back when, it doesn't matter that much, either. ]

Toge, Toge, you don't swim?
That's a very tragic oversight!

[cursedwords]

[ Like he could. ]

No? It's never come up before.
I'm sure I could if I learned how to do it. It's just a sport. I'm good at that.

text, un: andstill

[andstill]

Wait.

Is your student the fellow with the hands or one of the crabs.

[hyperviolence]

That's a little rude.
Of course my student is cuter than the crabs.
Though soon enough they'll all be my students.

[andstill]

It's important to be sure about these things.

You're certain your student doesn't need a pair of gloves? Looks like he's having a hard time of it.

[hyperviolence]

Meet many crab instructors?
Nah, he's tough and can take care of himself.
Have you tried babysitting the little ones?

[andstill]

Not yet, but here? It sure seems like it might be a possibility.

I have. They've got nasty little claws on them, even the littlest fellows. Had to get a pair of gardening gloves after the third one got me.

[hyperviolence]

That was smart.
But I'm sure those pinches will heal soon enough.

Been here long?

[andstill]

His hands, I suppose, not mine. I won't poke my nose into his business overmuch if they're not bothering him.

Couple months now, but I've mostly been keeping to myself. You?

[hyperviolence]

He's fine but your concern is appreciated.

Fresh off the boat, or on the boat rather.
It's been an experience so far.

Not a people person?

[andstill]

Not particularly. Better with the crabs and the other little fellows. Probably wouldn't have chimed in if you hadn't taken pictures of them.

[hyperviolence]

Isn't that too boring?
I mean, you do you, but in this environment, being on your own doesn't seem to have too many advantages.
And clearly you care a little?

Text; un: Pers

[scooba]

Is there a reason why you are calling the crabs your student?

[hyperviolence]

I'm not, not yet.
The handsome boy is my student.
The crabs are just crabs at the moment.

You don't condone teaching crabs?

[scooba]

No, not at all.

I'm surprised that you want to teach crabs.

[hyperviolence]

Listen, I'm all for trying everything once.
Besides, these crabs seem smarter than they look.
It could be fun.

[ 'fun' being the feature word here. he's just here to have a good time. ]

[scooba]

And what are you going to teach them?

[Fun, he says but here? Freminet was innocent enough to think that he Gojo would actually teach them something.]

[hyperviolence]

I don't know yet.
They'd have to accept me as their teacher first and then we'll have to see what they can learn, right?

Got any suggestions?

[scooba]

Perhaps finding food in a more effective way? It seems like it would really benefit them?

[hyperviolence]

That's cute and very practical.
But I think they'd learn that themselves growing up eventually.

I was thinking they could band together and form a giant crab.

[scooba]

But wouldn't it be heavy? Especially when they need to defend themselves against enemies too.

[Look, he's just thinking logically here!]

[hyperviolence]

[ ............ ]

In case of enemy, they'd scatter and run.
I'm talking play and fun here actually and not sending them into their deaths by giving them any hard missions.

[scooba]

Oh.

...

Then perhaps teach them how to play a little nicer?