forgeabettertomorrow: (this Lance guy sounds alright)
Darin Altway ([personal profile] forgeabettertomorrow) wrote in [community profile] shellphones2024-12-05 01:23 pm

Bedroom Talk

Type: Voice/Text
Sender ID: hammertime (Darin Altway)
To: Public
Subject: beds
Warnings: He's so stupid you guys

[Darin clears his throat because forget typing all of this out.]

Okay guys, I need you all to settle a bit of an argument Zelda and I are having.

See, we were out shopping for furniture for our new place and she tells me I need a bed. I say "you're right, I do! I know just the type!" So I go and I show her the hammocks because back home, I slept in a hammock. So she says [Darin clears his throat and proceeds to do his best Zelda voice] "Don't be preposterous, a hammock is not a proper bed."

Which is wrong. Because a hammock is totally a bed. Lots of things can be beds. So, to prove my point, I made this chart.



As you can see by this chart that I spent entirely too much time on, the parameters that dictate an objects "bedability" are thus. I think it's a pretty open and shut case.

Anyway, I think this explains why I should be allowed to get a hammock in my room. You guys are on my side on this, right?

[Just...you know. Ignore how he casually dropped that they're living together because he's brain dead.]
telepathicignorance: (Forehead)

[personal profile] telepathicignorance 2024-12-22 05:43 am (UTC)(link)
Okay but your limbs would still be a lot longer and heavier in comparison to the rest of you than a baby's are. Even if it were someone big enough that carrying you wouldn't be difficult, it'd probably still be uncomfortable.

(Being stuck in a baby harness sounds awful. Can you imagine being entirely dependent on someone else to carry you?)
telepathicignorance: (Default)

[personal profile] telepathicignorance 2024-12-25 12:22 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah.

I can't imagine being restrained and unable to move would be very fun either.


(Babies can't move much anyway, they're supposed to be carried around.)