[VOICE] | un: hammertime

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Type: Voice with Screencaps!
Sender ID: hammertime
To: Public
Subject: Shellphone Tech Support
Warnings: Stupidity

Okay, I admit I'm not the best when it comes to technology but I'm seriously running out of patience here! All I want to do is text someone! I was able to text them before but then I changed their name in my phone and now I can't AND IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT I CAN'T GET NEAR CERTAIN PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THESE BRANDS BUT IF I CAN'T TEXT SOMEONE NOW EXPLODING PRISONS ARE GONNA BE THE LEAST OF THEIR WORRIES.

[Darin takes a deep, steadying breath. Normally, the person he would go to for tech support is Zelda. A person he cannot presently go anywhere near. So now he's the network's problem.]

Look. Okay. I just. I need someone to look at my contacts and tell me if I screwed something up. Because I don't know what I did. I just changed one contact. I change contact names all the time! All the time!

LOOK. HERE.



CAN ANYONE SEE THE PROBLEM BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO TEXT SOMEONE AND EVERY TEXT I [Sounds of fingers furiously tapping] TRY [More tapping] I GET [TAPPING]

... ... ...

"MESSAGE CANNOT BE DELIVERED" MY BRIGHT, BLUE ASS!!! WHO THE HELL MADE THESE PIECES OF—

[Darin is drowned out by the sound of wind because he did, in fact, throw his phone.]

[He will retrieve it shortly once it lands.]

Comments

[forgeabettertomorrow]

It's the first thing that came to mind. Also I wanted to give you a cute nickname.

Oh good the screen didn't crack.

[tilfrosset]

I don't care to be reminded of my station in life, but I suppose it could be worse.

Like that picture. Could you not have found a more flattering one? I don't even remember taking that one.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

I didn't mean it that way. I meant that you needed more hugs.

Honestly, I just go through my camera and snag whatever accidental pictures I'd taken of people. If you want, I wouldn't mind getting a nicer one!

[tilfrosset]

Please do. You can keep the nickname, but I am particular about my appearance.

That aside, congratulations.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Sure, next time I see you, I'll get an extra nice one.

...But congratulations for what? Getting a nice photo of you?

[tilfrosset]

[There's a loud sigh that comes from her end of the conversation. Why does she always assume Darin has the one brain cell at any time?]

Zelda.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

What about her?

[tilfrosset]

You've apparently upgraded her status in your life.

1/2

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Wait...How did you—

2/2

[forgeabettertomorrow]

OH CRAP!! OH CRAP HOW DO I DELETE THIS?! CRAP CRAP CRAP!!

NO ONE'S SUPPOSED TO SEE THAT!!!!

[tilfrosset]

Perhaps it's a bit too late for that.

[Besides, she's the last person to ask for tech help from.]

Also, I think most of us have already assumed you and her had a courtship going on anyway. No need to panic.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

I...what, really?

What made you guys think that?

[He's...he's being serious.]

[tilfrosset]

[He's lucky she has the patience of a saint because she'd otherwise wonder if he has only air between his ears.]

Well, the bed situation is quite unforgettable. Also, it's how you talk about her. If it hadn't happened then, it would have sooner or later.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

I-I...I mean...

Th-The bed thing was. You know. She just didn't want me sleeping in a hammock! It's not like we were...sharing it or anything...

[tilfrosset]

But are you sharing it now?

[forgeabettertomorrow]

A-Ah...haha...hahahaha...

U-Um...

[Oh yes. Yes.]

[tilfrosset]

[Darin, can't you at least try to lie?]

Thus my point stands.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[HE'S LITERALLY INCAPABLE HE HATES LIARS.]

... ... ...

[Darin doesn't want to go too in-depth with what happened because...well, Jill is likely still grieving. He doesn't want to remind her of what she lost...]

I-It's uh...yeah. We're...you know.

Involved.

[tilfrosset]

[She'll forever be grieving, every day until Clive comes back. If he comes back. But in the meantime, she can still experience joy for her friends.]

Again, congratulations. You deserve some happiness in your life.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Th...Thanks. It's...kinda weird, honestly.

...So, wait. Hold on. You make it sound like everyone thought we'd get together.

Was it that obvious that I liked her...?

[Please don't be gentle.]

[tilfrosset]

Darin, I have been courted only once in my life and even I could see what you felt for her.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

W-What?!

I thought I made it clear we were just friends!!

[tilfrosset]

That's what you thought. How you acted was a different story. And one that has now been proven.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

Oh come! I was the picture of friendship! There's no way anyone could tell I was in love with her!

[tilfrosset]

Think back to how many people you spoke to during the bed discussion. How many of them had already assumed you and Zelda were together?

[Go ahead and think, Darin. Take your time. She'll wait.]