Darin Altway (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
forgeabettertomorrow) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
shellphones2025-04-25 04:02 pm
forgeabettertomorrow) wrote in shellphones2025-04-25 04:02 pm
[VOICE] | un: hammertime
Type: Voice with Screencaps!
Sender ID: hammertime
To: Public
Subject: Shellphone Tech Support
Warnings: Stupidity
Okay, I admit I'm not the best when it comes to technology but I'm seriously running out of patience here! All I want to do is text someone! I was able to text them before but then I changed their name in my phone and now I can't AND IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT I CAN'T GET NEAR CERTAIN PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THESE BRANDS BUT IF I CAN'T TEXT SOMEONE NOW EXPLODING PRISONS ARE GONNA BE THE LEAST OF THEIR WORRIES.
[Darin takes a deep, steadying breath. Normally, the person he would go to for tech support is Zelda. A person he cannot presently go anywhere near. So now he's the network's problem.]
Look. Okay. I just. I need someone to look at my contacts and tell me if I screwed something up. Because I don't know what I did. I just changed one contact. I change contact names all the time! All the time!
LOOK. HERE.
CAN ANYONE SEE THE PROBLEM BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO TEXT SOMEONE AND EVERY TEXT I [Sounds of fingers furiously tapping] TRY [More tapping] I GET [TAPPING]
... ... ...
"MESSAGE CANNOT BE DELIVERED" MY BRIGHT, BLUE ASS!!! WHO THE HELL MADE THESE PIECES OF—
[Darin is drowned out by the sound of wind because he did, in fact, throw his phone.]
[He will retrieve it shortly once it lands.]
Sender ID: hammertime
To: Public
Subject: Shellphone Tech Support
Warnings: Stupidity
Okay, I admit I'm not the best when it comes to technology but I'm seriously running out of patience here! All I want to do is text someone! I was able to text them before but then I changed their name in my phone and now I can't AND IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT I CAN'T GET NEAR CERTAIN PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THESE BRANDS BUT IF I CAN'T TEXT SOMEONE NOW EXPLODING PRISONS ARE GONNA BE THE LEAST OF THEIR WORRIES.
[Darin takes a deep, steadying breath. Normally, the person he would go to for tech support is Zelda. A person he cannot presently go anywhere near. So now he's the network's problem.]
Look. Okay. I just. I need someone to look at my contacts and tell me if I screwed something up. Because I don't know what I did. I just changed one contact. I change contact names all the time! All the time!
LOOK. HERE.
CAN ANYONE SEE THE PROBLEM BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO TEXT SOMEONE AND EVERY TEXT I [Sounds of fingers furiously tapping] TRY [More tapping] I GET [TAPPING]
... ... ...
"MESSAGE CANNOT BE DELIVERED" MY BRIGHT, BLUE ASS!!! WHO THE HELL MADE THESE PIECES OF—
[Darin is drowned out by the sound of wind because he did, in fact, throw his phone.]
[He will retrieve it shortly once it lands.]
no subject
( cheering. )
And who is the first?! Tell me who you think has the best tits!
1/2
[But as opposed to belting out a name, he exhales and takes steadying breath.]
2/2
Heh, I see what you're doing. You're trying to get me to say a specific name aren't you?? I can see through your little trick. I'm not gonna fall for it this time! Not like when I said that Zelda having a perfect ass was a truth of the universe!
Sorry, Karlach! Try again~!
zelda is going to delete her account
( she nods despite the fact no one can see it. )
So Zelda doesn't have the best tits according to you? Too small? Not your shape?
Or kill Darin. Or both.
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( obviously. )
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( there's a smile in her voice. )
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You can't embarrass me because I have nothing to be embarrassed about!
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I'll have to start calling you Tomato Boy instead once I'm done with you.
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Do your absolute worst, Karlach!
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( and most importantly. )
Captain girlfriend needs a reason for the revenge.
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It's the playful kind and she seems like she's got a wild streak in her.
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[No comment on that 'wild streak' comment though because.]
[Well]
[Because.]
voice | un: netherese
Karlach, really; perhaps you ought to take it easy on the poor boy. At this rate, you're going to kill the young man, and then no one will be happy, including you.
[That he's managed to say all of that with a straight face is incredible, because he's absolutely been laughing while listening along, against his better judgement.]
no, gale. run.
he's playing a dangerous game with his own life
If Karlach were anyone but who she is, this would most certainly be a trap. It likely still is, but a far less malicious sort, or so he would hope.]
I feel I ought to take extreme caution in how I answer this. Clearly, he's been blinded by the fact that his affections are decidedly elsewhere.
[He's glad she can't see how red his face has to be at the moment, but she can probably hear it at this point.]
♥
What I'm hearing is you think mine are the best.
( playfully. )
Always knew you were a man of taste.
no subject
[He clears his throat, a playful note of amusement in his voice.]
I've something of a reputation for my keen eye, and I'll be the first to admit I have a fondness for the finer things in life.