Backdated to July 2nd

[general_affairs]

Type: Video
Sender ID: general-affairs
To: Public
Subject: Weird ass birds
Warnings: Swearing, nsfw topics



[ So there's a redhead on screen, and he's sitting outside, clearly. It's a nice, sunny day. There are clouds overhead. He looks like he's maybe sitting against something. From the color and texture, and the greenery around him, it looks like he's just casually sitting under a tree.

Why is Reno out near the wood's edge? Mind your business. ]

So, you guys hear that?

[ He lowers the camera so the viewers get a vague view of his be-goggled forehead, a bushel of red hair, and a whole lot of tree canopy overhead. Nothing else is happening, except, after a few moments, there it is:

a faint 'DICKS!!'.

There are a few more replies of 'DICKS!!' echoing from various directions. ]

Anyone wanna tell me why the woods're screamin' about dicks?

I mean--shit. Me too, buddy. But I don't go yellin' about it, yo.

Comments

video;

[activatingcombatmode]

[Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Don't lose your shit.]

Huh. Weird. Sounds like the trees are yelling about dicks.

[He shrugs......................! Totally wasn't his doing!!]

It's probably those fancy parrots the conservatory keeps. If that helps.

[A beat.]

Don't know why they're talking about dicks, though.

[general_affairs]

[ You good over there Zack? ]

Fuckin' surrounded by wood and I'm not gettin' any. Pour one out for me, bro.

[ He snorted with a laugh. ]

Oh yeah--I think I saw somethin' about some birds by the Manta office a while back. 'Tempted to yell pussy, but they'd probably boo me right outta the woods.

voice; un: makoglow

[makoglow]

Sounds like a personal problem. And that the locals have some self respect.

video

[general_affairs]

[ Oh there's VISIBLE surprise on his face, followed up quickly by vulpine delight. ]

What's me talking about wantin' to get laid gettin' you all pissy for, huh?

[makoglow]

Just figuring that if you're hearing the echoes of birds calling and that's what you're whining about? Seems like that's on you. Doesn't mean you got to share with the class.

[general_affairs]

Sound like someone wants to do something about it.

[ He's leaning over his own lap, elbow resting on his knee, chin in his palm, grinning at the camera. ]

[makoglow]

If it'll get you to stop being like that on main? Absolutely.

[ Sorry Reno. He's not getting your other potential meaning there. ]

[general_affairs]

Listen, if you wanted to hop on this ride, all you had to do was ask.

[ A wink. ]

1/2

[makoglow]

[ Look. Cloud is oblivious when it comes to people flirting with him. Or, you know, that they have any interest whatsoever. In him. Has no idea. Completely clueless.

But even he can't possibly take that one out of context.

Which is why he's sputtering. Absolutely stunned into silence as the wheels in that spikey head of his start to turn.

Cause what the hell! ]

[makoglow]

[ But he will find his voice. After a bit of awkward silence because he's just so gobsmacked and augh. Augh this is all Zack's fault! ]

Quit screwing around...

[ A+ phrase to use there. ]

[general_affairs]

[ The silence is deafening, and Reno's just watching with bright-eyed entertainment. He's just so delighted by this. As the seconds tick by, that mockery of innocent joy he's got on his face falters and reveals, again, his impish entertainment. ]

Usually you go out on a few dates before askin' 'em to go exclusive, yo.

[makoglow]

[ He hates this. This was supposed to be him shitting on Reno. In a non aggressive way.

When did it turn back on him? ]

Didn't realize you were so hard up to go to another wedding.

[general_affairs]

You didn't realize I was so what?

Cloud, c'mon. You're cute when you're flustered and all, but you're just writin' the jokes for me over here.

1/2

[makoglow]

[ This man is muttering swears under his breath now, Reno. Hopes you choke on the feathers of all of those birds out there. ]

[makoglow]

I'm not flustered. You're imagining things.

[activatingcombatmode]

[What in the world is going on in this voice call with Cloud there? Is he going to have to sucker punch Reno?]

I guess the lesson learned here is as much as you yell dicks it doesn't mean you'll always get dicks.

[Sorry, bro. Well, there's always Naughtilust?]

[general_affairs]

[ Reno was in his lane, flourishing. Having a good day. Staying hydrated. Being productive.

Cloud was the one that started it! Reno just finished it. ]

Maybe the real dicks are the friends we made along the way.

[ A beat. ]

Not derogatory dick--fuckin'. You know what I was goin' for, Fair.

[activatingcombatmode]

[Zack laughs.]

Yeah, I get you. I'm sorry you're dry in the water right now. But I believe in you.

[general_affairs]

[ A snort of a laugh. ]

Don't think you're slick, I caught that. Dry in the water--listen, not all of us are drownin' in pussy, yo. [ He sees you, Zack. ]

Even without bossman and his laundry lists, it's not actually that high up on my list of priorities, but it is pretty funny, not gonna lie.

[activatingcombatmode]

[He's barking with laughter on his side.]

I'm just grilling you, man.

I know you're all talk but when it comes down to it you've got your priorities straight. Or at least I hope you do.

As for the birds yelling dick, that might have been partly my fault. They mimic people. So trying to find them might have gotten out of hand. With Cloud.

[general_affairs]

You're good slick. Cmon, you know I'm gonna give it back. ;)

Depends on who you ask, so maybe just ask Rude about my priorities. I still badger Bossman about going to Evan's birthday parties.

What, you yelled dick and made blondie listen to a chorus of birds yell it back? Hilarious, but not that bad.

[activatingcombatmode]

No, even better.

I made Cloud yell Dicks as loud as he could.

[general_affairs]

LMAO no wonder he got pissy about it .

They grow up so fast.

[activatingcombatmode]

I thought it was pretty fun. Cloud didn't think so.

But when else am I gonna get the chance to see him do something like that?

[general_affairs]

Truly a legend. Thanks for taking one for the team yo.

Listen, he got way too smug while strutting around that resort in a dress. We both know he's laughing about it even if he wants to be all pouty and broody on the outside.