Text;

[thearchangel]

Type: Text
Sender ID: thearchangel (Garrus Vakarian)
To: Everyone
Subject: Help Wanted
Warnings: N/A

All right, I cave.

Help wanted for someone who can engineer a way to keep someone from sinking the second they set foot in a body of water.




And please don't say "swimming lessons" - that's not physically possible without a lot of flotation assistance.

Comments

video;

[thearchangel]

[... You know he really should have expected questions, given how he didn't elaborate. Good going, Vakarian.]

No. My people have metallic plating. [Sort of. Kind of. Easiest way to put it.] Trying to float looks more like flailing, followed by drowning.

[halfdog]

[ Oh. Whoa. Okay. He was not expecting to see that on the other side of the screen! So forgive Inuyasha's.... tactfulness when he blurts out. ]

What the— what the heck are you?

[thearchangel]

Currently? Worried about drowning.

[He's a comedian.]

Let me guess - you've never seen one of my people before? Not in your world?

[halfdog]

[ Ha ha. Very funny.

He almost rolls his eyes at that, but he's more curious about Garrus' answer more than his annoyance. ]

I mean, I've seen some freaky lookin' demons before, but something tells me you ain't one of 'em.

[thearchangel]

[He's hilarious excuse you. Comedian of the game.]

No, no, I am not. Nothing even close to a "demon".

[Different tactic might be needed...] Does the concept of "aliens" exist in your world?

[halfdog]

[ Don't expect him to come to your shows anytime soon!!



.... And sorry, but that'll earn another stare, this time his face going a bit blank. ]

Nuh uh. Guessin' that's what you are, though?

[thearchangel]

[Yeah he was afraid of this.]

That's what humans say. Easiest explanation to run with in a place like this.

[halfdog]

I ain't stupid. [ And not a human, either! ] If you don't wanna be called an "alien" or whatever the hell it is, then just say what you are!

Or, y'know, if you got a name or something.

[thearchangel]

I didn't say that. [Easy, down boy.] It's just easier sometimes, to explain it that way, for everyone involved.

It's Garrus. And I'm a turian.

[halfdog]

Garrus the turian. Got it. [ He does, in fact, not get it. ] I'm Inuyasha.

So what, can turians not take off the metal pieces? Are they stuck on ya?

[thearchangel]

Nice meeting you.

My armor, sure. But not my actual plating. It'd be like you removing pieces of your skin.

[halfdog]

[ Cue the cringed grimace as that mental image flashes through his mind. ]

Gross! Okay, I get your point.

So then… why not look for somethin’ here? This place is magical, isn’t it? There’s gotta be a thing here that can keep you from drowning. I keep hearing about these “relics” or whatever.

[thearchangel]

[He inclines his head a little - you're welcome for that image, Inuyasha.]

Mostly, because I don't know a damn thing about 'magic'. So... asking people here with more experience seemed like the best bet.

Yeah. Apparently the "relics" are all underwater, too.

[halfdog]

Underwater? Damn, you're really unlucky, aren't ya?

[thearchangel]

That's me. Unluckiest son of a bitch in this world.