Darin Altway (
forgeabettertomorrow) wrote in
shellphones2024-12-05 01:23 pm
Entry tags:
- alhaitham,
- axel,
- azul ashengrotto,
- cidolfus telamon,
- commander shepard,
- darin altway,
- della duck,
- emet-selch,
- gale dekarios,
- garrus vakarian,
- hiro hamada,
- jill warrick,
- karlach cliffgate,
- kaveh,
- miriam,
- naeva dos martos,
- nappa,
- ranma saotome,
- reno,
- roxas,
- sakata kintoki,
- sherlock holmes,
- sidestep,
- vash the stampede,
- zelda
Bedroom Talk
Type: Voice/Text
Sender ID: hammertime (Darin Altway)
To: Public
Subject: beds
Warnings: He's so stupid you guys
[Darin clears his throat because forget typing all of this out.]
Okay guys, I need you all to settle a bit of an argument Zelda and I are having.
See, we were out shopping for furniture for our new place and she tells me I need a bed. I say "you're right, I do! I know just the type!" So I go and I show her the hammocks because back home, I slept in a hammock. So she says [Darin clears his throat and proceeds to do his best Zelda voice] "Don't be preposterous, a hammock is not a proper bed."
Which is wrong. Because a hammock is totally a bed. Lots of things can be beds. So, to prove my point, I made this chart.

As you can see by this chart that I spent entirely too much time on, the parameters that dictate an objects "bedability" are thus. I think it's a pretty open and shut case.
Anyway, I think this explains why I should be allowed to get a hammock in my room. You guys are on my side on this, right?
[Just...you know. Ignore how he casually dropped that they're living together because he's brain dead.]
Sender ID: hammertime (Darin Altway)
To: Public
Subject: beds
Warnings: He's so stupid you guys
[Darin clears his throat because forget typing all of this out.]
Okay guys, I need you all to settle a bit of an argument Zelda and I are having.
See, we were out shopping for furniture for our new place and she tells me I need a bed. I say "you're right, I do! I know just the type!" So I go and I show her the hammocks because back home, I slept in a hammock. So she says [Darin clears his throat and proceeds to do his best Zelda voice] "Don't be preposterous, a hammock is not a proper bed."
Which is wrong. Because a hammock is totally a bed. Lots of things can be beds. So, to prove my point, I made this chart.

As you can see by this chart that I spent entirely too much time on, the parameters that dictate an objects "bedability" are thus. I think it's a pretty open and shut case.
Anyway, I think this explains why I should be allowed to get a hammock in my room. You guys are on my side on this, right?
[Just...you know. Ignore how he casually dropped that they're living together because he's brain dead.]

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... you two banged, and there isn't anything more than [Doing a very good Darin impression and even restyled his hair for a split second to the beefcake, minus the pigtail] 'being close' going on?
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Blame Darin for spilling, not me!
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[That man's beyond help.]
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[GO AFTER HIM!!!!]
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[:<]
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I am, however, trying to save you before she sees this.
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It'll be your funeral too! You're the loud mouth who blabbed it!!!
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(2/3) I lied
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NO THAT WAS SOMEONE ELSE!!!
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You got—
What??
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[Shut up, and get back on track.]
Forget about that, this isn't about me, this is about you and Zels. Or hammocks.
[Sorta lost the plot there.]
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[:3]
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In our new house.
Where we have separate rooms.
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Oh. Why didn'tcha mention that earlier?
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