shellphones | Bedroom Talk

Entry tags:

Bedroom Talk

Type: Voice/Text
Sender ID: hammertime (Darin Altway)
To: Public
Subject: beds
Warnings: He's so stupid you guys

[Darin clears his throat because forget typing all of this out.]

Okay guys, I need you all to settle a bit of an argument Zelda and I are having.

See, we were out shopping for furniture for our new place and she tells me I need a bed. I say "you're right, I do! I know just the type!" So I go and I show her the hammocks because back home, I slept in a hammock. So she says [Darin clears his throat and proceeds to do his best Zelda voice] "Don't be preposterous, a hammock is not a proper bed."

Which is wrong. Because a hammock is totally a bed. Lots of things can be beds. So, to prove my point, I made this chart.

As you can see by this chart that I spent entirely too much time on, the parameters that dictate an objects "bedability" are thus. I think it's a pretty open and shut case.

Anyway, I think this explains why I should be allowed to get a hammock in my room. You guys are on my side on this, right?

[Just...you know. Ignore how he casually dropped that they're living together because he's brain dead.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Therefore, you're going to get a proper bed and be prepared rather than waste time arguing over a hammock and whether or not you're going to take the floor.

Save her the trouble.

...Huh.

Yeah, that makes sense. I really wanted to get a hammock but if something happens...

Besides...I think she just really wants me to be as comfortable as possible which...I guess I'm still kinda resistant to?

I dunno, I'm not used to people worrying about me.

Sorry to tell you, but that's something you'll have to get used to. I can tell there are a fair few of us who care about you and while I don't know her, I feel like I can safely assume that Zelda does most of all.

Which is another reason why you should listen to her.

It's...I don't want to say it's 'difficult' because that implies that the people trying to care for me make it hard. And it's not them.

It's me.

You guys...so many of you have accepted me without even knowing the truth about me and it's hard to reconcile. Sometimes I feel like I'm just...tricking everyone.

You must think a little better of the collection of us. Besides, I know for a fact that many of us have our own histories that make it hard to judge yours.

I think the world of you guys. And I...I know that. Honestly, I'm thankful.

But hold habits, you know? Getting this house and asking Zelda to move in was...it was kind of the first step to accepting that maybe I'm worth more than I thought I was. Even if it's just a little bit.

I know. I understand more than you'll ever know. It took me years to stop thinking of myself as a monster for things I did, things I was told to do, forced to do...

[She looks down at her hands, splaying them open palms up as if she can see the proverbial blood that stains them.]

I would be a hypocrite if I even judged you a bit. Besides, you've been nothing but kind to Clive and me and how could I judge someone like that?

C-Come on...I'm just...

I-I do what's right, you know?? It's how things should be.

But...for what it's worth, I'm sorry you had to endure those things. If you ever want to...I dunno. Process them?

I think I'd like to hear about them.

[Jill, Clive, Cid, Joshua, Cid, and Benedikta are all so similar to him. He wants to help them because they deserve peace for once.]

It is how things should be, though they aren't always.

[Still staring at her hands, she takes a deep breath before continuing. Then Jill looks up, giving him a tired and sad smile that doesn't reach her eyes one bit. Does she want to tell Darin? Yes, but this started out on such a lighthearted topic it feels almost criminal to turn the conversation this way...]

We're supposed to be talking about you getting a proper bed, not my formative years.

Yeah but right now I think our shared experiences are a lot more interesting than my sleeping situation.

I feel like there's a lot of assumptions being made that I haven't helped clear up.

Assumptions? About you or me?

Though, as I think about it, you might have some about me that I should clear up myself...

Me. And who I'm supposedly sharing a bed with.

Wait, assumptions about you? I don't think I have any of those.

Well, no, you haven't really helped to clear those up. In fact, I believe you may have made them worse with certain statements.

Unless Clive has told you about me, you probably have assumed I am nothing but a regular person. This might be the right time to tell you that I'm not.

Are people really so gossip starved that they'd read into me posting an elaborate and accurate chart I spent time making as me announcing I'm in a relationship? Because that's kind of a stretch, don't you think?

[Darin kinda...blinks slowly.]

You're...an awesome person?

Perhaps. But your overly enthusiastic nomination of her for the calendar also did not help.

[There's a sharp intake of a breath that sounds like a self-deprecating laugh, but her facial expression has no humor in it. Awesome? Clearly one of those assumptions she needs to rectify.]

Anything but. My hands have been far too bloody for that kind of courtesy.

... ... ...

Okay, but she deserves to be celebrated. She...

She didn't have it easy. Hell, I know a lot of us haven't but of all people, she deserves to be recognized as someone who brings a lot of happiness wherever she goes.

[She spent her life training for a calamity that took everything from her. She sealed herself away for a hundred years. Does anyone even know the sacrifice she made? Do people love her for her title without knowing what she's done for them? What she's put herself through?]

[But the mention of blood on her hands shakes Darin from his musings.]

...'Bloody?' What do you mean?

Yes, but it appears she brings you, in particular, a different sort of happiness. The kind Clive brings me. But I'm not being judgmental, just merely making an observation.

[She's looking down at the hands in question, shaking her head slowly. He may think poorly of her after this, but it wouldn't be the first time. It's something she's come to accept even with all the good she's done in the last few years.]

I'm a Dominant. The Eikon Shiva resides inside me. And because of that many men, both guilty and innocent, have met the end of their lives because of me, from when I was just a girl of twelve summers to my adult years.

[Darin clears his throat bashfully.]

I-I...guess you could say that. I-In a way...

[Darin pauses when he hears the word 'Dominant' again. Gods above, how many Dominants were there? Cid, Benedikta, Joshua, Clive, and even Jill? What, were the gods of her world running a bargain sale or something??]

[Darin crosses his arms.]

And that's your fault, how exactly?

In a way? I'd say it's more than just in a way.

[If the gods of her world had any sense, they would have saved the Dominants and the Bearers the curse. Instead they probably just sat back and enjoyed all the warring and suffering over which Dominant could beat the other.]

I did it so all the other girls wouldn't have to suffer. I did what I was told to do to save them and yet, sometimes that wasn't enough. It was all in vain.

[She takes a deep breath to steady herself, but the worst of the memories come flooding back and it gives a shake to her voice.]

Maybe I could have, should have fought back. Fought harder. Let them continue to beat me until I caved. Found another way. I didn't and that led to more people suffering than I saved.

[Darin heaves a sigh and privates the thread. Thankfully, after the gaffe with Zelda about the legitimacy of Ghost Marriage, she has helpfully taught him how to do this.]

I don't think any of that's on you. When there's a river of blood and someone forces you to wash your hands in it, whose fault is it? The people who spilled the blood or the people who forced you to dip your hands into it? I don't think it's ever the person who gets it on their hands.

At least you tried to save people.

...I've told this to the other dominants so I don't mind sharing but...I'm the reincarnation of a demonic god. Or...half of one. My twin brother is the other half. Either way, I've got half the soul of a god of destruction tethered to my own and apparently, I was prophesied to destroy my world.

To give you an idea of what I can do, I fought Garuda with my bare hands. I didn't win but...well, she doesn't bare me any grudges.

Edited 2025-01-03 23:44 (UTC)

Darin, I was the monster who created that river of blood. To wash my hands in it would just be another reminder of what I've done, what I'm capable of doing. One of many I cannot allow myself to ignore.

And your brother... he shares the same prophesy?

[On that last note, Jill's eyebrows rise a bit up along her forehead. Impressively strong Darin must be, but she still thinks no less of him.]

Clive once fought her... [And ended her life, but Jill isn't going to say that out loud.] ...but even he took steel and Ifrit to her.

I'm not going to argue that your choices were yours, yeah. But...it sounds like you're carrying a lot of guilt about what Dominants are and how that's been foisted upon you.

Honestly, I'm still not entirely clear. I get that they're essentially gods but...what's their purpose? Why were you all born with them?

And...yeah, Dromas shares the same prophecy. He's the one who told me about it. After he'd been murdered as a child and then came back from the dead. Up until then, I spent my entire life not even knowing what I was. Only that people just assumed I was responsible for everyone in my family dying because I was a freak.

[Darin takes a slow, steadying breath.]

My brother wiped out a city. Before I arrived here. Killed everyone then shaped the city into a spire. He did it because he wanted to prove a point to me. To "show me what I was capable of."

Jill, I don't know a damn thing about what I am or what I can do. I don't even know if my strength has an upper limit. All I know is if I punch too hard I can blow my own arm off.

Why us, well, some think it's due to our bloodlines, others think it's by chance like being born with the unfortunate ability to use magic without shard of the Mothercrystal. As far my case is considered, we know Shiva has appeared in people of the Northern Territories which is where I hail from. As for their purpose, a being called Ultima created them to bring resurrect his kind and recreate the world in his will. I assure you it's not as simple as that, as it never is with those with nefarious plans on their mind, but it is is the base reason behind it all. Amongst the people, it depends on who you ask. Some honor them as gods. Ask the Ironblood and they'll tell you that I'm nothing but an abomination who is good for nothing but use in war. If they didn't need me for that, I'm sure I would have met my end much earlier in life.

Your brother has a strange way of getting his point across. [She shakes her head, knowing that is nothing but an understatement.] Where is he now? Not here, I'd assume or else you would have said so, but back in your world, I mean.

Let's try and not do that unless necessary, Darin. I'm sure Zelda would be at least one person who would appreciate you keeping your arm.

No. Gods no. If he was here I'd...we'd all know. And I doubt he'd allow me an ounce of happiness. I wouldn't even be talking to anyone out of fear of putting a target on their backs.

[To say nothing of Zelda.]

...So...you grew up believing yourself to be some harbinger of war. All because a god decided to play with peoples lives.

I hate that I can relate to that.

Is there something the rest of us can do if he does end up here? If he is as bad as you say, we should have a plan about things.

I didn't know I was a Dominant until I was abducted by the Iron Kingdom when I was in my twelfth year. Before that, I was a ward of the Rosarian Duchy after the war between Rosaria and the Northern Territories. I thought I was just a normal little girl.

[A little girl who was used as a pawn to keep her father from fighting back.]

Then the gods decided I didn't have enough trouble in my life. But I guess you're right. I did grow up thinking of myself as nothing but weapon of war.

Bedroom Talk

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

SORRY FOR THE DELAY. Life got in the way D:

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

[PRIVATE]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)